Relationship Lost my relationship because of counselor



I have been married to my husband for 20 years and together for 23+ years. While he did show signs of anger, I remained with him. Over time I developed depression and did not seek help. I ended up causing emotional abuse toward him and my daughters. I got help and medication much later and then he left me. We reunited 3 months later and things were going great until about mid-August. Every time I would start a conversation, he would escalate it into a fight then threaten to leave. It was literally like we switched roles. One day I was the love of his life and thankful that I have stayed with him through what he is dealing with (did not tell me what he was going through) then a day or two later, he went back into this funk. Back and forth and I told him that I wanted to support him because I never got that support from him with my depression. I am not blaming him as it is my condition, my problem. Well, he left me again in September. He is actually going to counseling now and he was diagnosed with C-TPSD and depression as one of the many side effects. This counselor told him to avoid me because I was his trigger for his emotional collapse. I am devasted because I have been a better and different person for the last year. How could a counselor even tell a patient to avoid his wife? I thought they were supposed to help mend the relationship. I am beyond devasted because how am I supposed to compete with the words of a therapist. Yes, I admitted that I did emotionally abuse but I never escalated it to physical abuse nor ever thought I was never wrong. An abuser will continue to escalate the situation and get worse as they try to minimize the abusee. I have changed and a better person and continue to be a better person. I truly feel like I have lost my marriage now because of this counselor.