Miss_Basilisk
Learning
Hi all. Am in need of some advice cause I have no idea what to think or do.
I’ve been friends with this guy for over a year now. In all honesty, it started as just casual sex but we became friends too. Somewhere in mid 2019, I started to develop feelings for him. (Not something that happens often or easily)
I opened up to him about it and he was very understanding but not looking for a relationship. I took some time to think and came to the decision to continue being friends with him because I really do enjoy being around him and he’s one of the sweetest people I know. We talk every day now, used to see each other every week or so.
But the thing is, I’ve also grown increasingly unstable over the past year. I had a psychotic episode and overdosed in August and have been very depressed and suicidal since.
He knows about this and has been a great source of comfort. Because of this, my feelings grew stronger but I no longer know whether it is actual romantic attraction or if I have just become dependent on his company and the comfort he provides. My brain has been very delusional and just all around messy lately and it’s been so hard for me to actually reflect on how i feel.
I guess my question is, how do I know whether what I’m feeling is love or if it is just my messed up, traumatised brain trying to seek comfort and clinging on to someone who is actually nice to me? And either way, what should I do to stop how I’m feeling?
Thanks for any replies, I hope you all are staying safe in these troubling times.
I’ve been friends with this guy for over a year now. In all honesty, it started as just casual sex but we became friends too. Somewhere in mid 2019, I started to develop feelings for him. (Not something that happens often or easily)
I opened up to him about it and he was very understanding but not looking for a relationship. I took some time to think and came to the decision to continue being friends with him because I really do enjoy being around him and he’s one of the sweetest people I know. We talk every day now, used to see each other every week or so.
But the thing is, I’ve also grown increasingly unstable over the past year. I had a psychotic episode and overdosed in August and have been very depressed and suicidal since.
He knows about this and has been a great source of comfort. Because of this, my feelings grew stronger but I no longer know whether it is actual romantic attraction or if I have just become dependent on his company and the comfort he provides. My brain has been very delusional and just all around messy lately and it’s been so hard for me to actually reflect on how i feel.
I guess my question is, how do I know whether what I’m feeling is love or if it is just my messed up, traumatised brain trying to seek comfort and clinging on to someone who is actually nice to me? And either way, what should I do to stop how I’m feeling?
Thanks for any replies, I hope you all are staying safe in these troubling times.