Hi everyone,
I'm not the greatest when it comes to introductions. A friend of mine shared this website/forum with me and thought it might be helpful to share here.
I am 33 years old. At the age of 28 I was diagnosed four years ago with PTSD (although I believe its more complex), Major depression Disorder, Social and General Anxieties, and Stockholm Syndrome. I was only began treatment and was diagnosed after my main abuser passed away suddenly from cardiac arrest. Before that I wasn't allowed to interact or speak to any professional. I was simply a prisoner inside the four walls with my father ( the abuser). My mother was a silent bystander, who did not assist in helping what so ever. She just let it continue. I endured, sexual, physical, verbal, emotional, psychological abuses for over 20 years.
I struggle daily with triggers, anxiety and flashbacks the most. I try to push through my depression every day. I feel the inability to move forward although I really want too. I have a difficult expressing how I feel or showing emotion because I either feel numb or blocked. Interacting with people is a huge barrier for me but i try to do my best when i need too. I have been seeing a therapist off and on. Currently I am just seeing a psychiatrist who prescribes medications. I take what I need when i feel things are getting out of control. I am afraid I will become dependent on the meds.
I hope this forum with help me better understand and relate to the struggles I face. I realize the scars will remain for a lifetime but I am hopeful that somehow someday things will be a little bit brighter. Wishing you all the best on your journey. Stay Strong!
Sarah
I'm not the greatest when it comes to introductions. A friend of mine shared this website/forum with me and thought it might be helpful to share here.
I am 33 years old. At the age of 28 I was diagnosed four years ago with PTSD (although I believe its more complex), Major depression Disorder, Social and General Anxieties, and Stockholm Syndrome. I was only began treatment and was diagnosed after my main abuser passed away suddenly from cardiac arrest. Before that I wasn't allowed to interact or speak to any professional. I was simply a prisoner inside the four walls with my father ( the abuser). My mother was a silent bystander, who did not assist in helping what so ever. She just let it continue. I endured, sexual, physical, verbal, emotional, psychological abuses for over 20 years.
I struggle daily with triggers, anxiety and flashbacks the most. I try to push through my depression every day. I feel the inability to move forward although I really want too. I have a difficult expressing how I feel or showing emotion because I either feel numb or blocked. Interacting with people is a huge barrier for me but i try to do my best when i need too. I have been seeing a therapist off and on. Currently I am just seeing a psychiatrist who prescribes medications. I take what I need when i feel things are getting out of control. I am afraid I will become dependent on the meds.
I hope this forum with help me better understand and relate to the struggles I face. I realize the scars will remain for a lifetime but I am hopeful that somehow someday things will be a little bit brighter. Wishing you all the best on your journey. Stay Strong!
Sarah