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Marilyn Being a Moderated Member

Discussion in 'Social' started by anthony, Sep 16, 2007.

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  1. anthony

    anthony Silently Watching Founder

    This is a courtesy notice to members that I have placed Marilyn_S back into moderation. As Marilyn has pointed out to me in a recent email, she believes my actions are secretive, which truly are not. All moderators know why she is in moderation, and due once again to her own actions through words to me once again judging my character, here is why she is moderated.

    Marilyn was banned for unsavoury behaviour initially, she breached privacy. Now Marilyn is moderated due to her recent behaviour of professing her love towards myself. Marilyn was fixated upon me before she was banned, Marilyn stated herself in her return message that she learnt she could no longer be fixated upon me nor expect one person to help her.

    Well, that went out the door very quickly as she is back to where she left off here. Marilyn has a personality disorder, most likely undiagnosed, and this is why her therapists have also likely pushed her away from them. She takes someone helping her beyond what it is, instead she becomes dependant upon that person to an extent of stalking, harassmental behaviour, etc etc... real fixated type behaviour.

    So Marilyn has begun this behaviour once again, though this time stepping far beyond and over any personal boundaries of this forums aim; that is to help people suffering PTSD and carers / friends of a PTSD sufferer. This forum is not equipped to handle personality disorders, instead this takes medication and professional psychiatric help.

    So, because Marilyn once again in her behaviour judges my character as the owner of this forum, now she will likely once again judge me as embarrassing her, which would be the exact contradiction to her recent email to myself outlining my character by not telling members why she is moderated.

    Because of her suspected personality disorder, Marilyn will remain moderated for most likely all time here until such time as her personality disorder is completely in control, and that isn't going to be any time soon.

    This is just another issue we must put up with upon the forum, and this is what editors do. Marilyn's behaviour must be moderated from members due to the personality disorder aspect. Personality disorders are serious business, they are not to be dismissed lightly. She is ill beyond the capacity that this forum can cater, thus her input here must be moderated to ensure it will not create unstable behaviour from those who are depressed or highly anxious at present.

    You can place a bunch of PTSD sufferers in one location and they will fight, though they are on even playing fields. Place a person with a personality disorder amongst this and the playing field is no longer level. Marilyn will use extremely manipulative behaviour in which to get inside of peoples boundaries, behaviour which is all negative though she simply will not know such at the time of doing it. Marilyn is ill, her behaviour far from appropriate upon this forum, and this is why she is back in moderation.
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  3. ryair

    ryair Active Member

    I dont often post a comment in regards to this sort of thing, however I must thank you for your explanation to other members. I have been concerned about quite a few of her posts as I have indeed seen them as manipulative. PTSD is hard enough to deal with for sufferers without the added burden of a members personality disorder to contend with.
    You are very upfront, and this is just one of the qualities that make this board such a success.
    Thanks for looking out for us:thumbs-up. You do an amazing job.
  4. becvan

    becvan Queen of the Blunt! Premium Member

    I would just like to remind our community that when members are edited (other than simple stuff), moderated, banned and approved or disapproved for groups, that we (see that PLURAL) editors discuss these issues and what to do.

    It's a group decision. So, it is not one person being power hungry or stroking their ego, nor is it members ganging up on members.

    We work our editorial and moderating abilities the same as this forum functions: It's all about group work and the members.

  5. anthony

    anthony Silently Watching Founder

    What bec said.... which she is also trying to protect myself from just taking any and all blame another member may have for my post above. It was a group decision and discussion surround Marilyn and in fact all members are discussed before action is ever taken. Thanks bec, thanks ryair.

    Marilyn just needs help beyond what this forum can do for her. I will explain a little further in relation to personality disorders and PTSD.

    PTSD can cause a personality disorder. A personality disorder can cause PTSD. Interesting statement that!

    Someone with long standing PTSD, ie. abused children into adolescence and remain untreated for years, PTSD can make it quite challenging for a sufferer to differentiate between myth and reality. The brain makes up stories for us, makes up trauma for us, and it is so real to our brain that we believe it. Our personality changes as a result. Some may gain a dependent personality disorder, ie. they attach themselves to anyone that pays them attention or helps them in the slightest way. They take that person and feed from them, never getting better, but using them as an enabler to approve their behaviour to themselves.

    You then get the opposite, in that a person with a personality disorder can create trauma for themselves through that disorder. Multiple personalities for example, one personality does bad things, thus creating trauma. That trauma can then manifest into PTSD.

    It is often found by physicians that they could diagnose a personality disorder with PTSD sufferers, and as you read personal stories here that very thing happens, when in fact most don't actually have a personality disorder, PTSD just makes it look that way. Saying that, a very minor percentage may off developed an actual personality disorder that now functions uniquely to PTSD. Typically when you work at a person anxiety their symptoms lessen, and the personality disorders / bipolar disorder, etc, all tend to then magically disappear as a result once trauma has been reduced, being the anxiety.

    It is a real problem, and again, something rare that typically has actually developed. I do not diagnose people, that is what doctors are for, and never have claimed such. I do however seek professional advice for some people at times to have their opinion given if I believe a person is beyond just PTSD.
  6. cactus_jack

    cactus_jack Well-Known Member

    Really sad. She's in my prayers.
  7. Kathy

    Kathy I'm a VIP

    Simply to confirm and support what both Anthony and Bec have said, a personality disorder is very serious indeed and not to be taken lightly. I do hope Marilyn gets the treatment she desperately needs, however that treatment and help cannot come from someone she is fixated upon. It is truly beyond the capability of anyone upon this forum to assist her adequately.
  8. batgirl

    batgirl I'm a VIP

    Oh wow. Thank you Anthony, Bec, Mum and the other moderators for everything you do here to protect us.

    Marilyn, if you're still reading here, I hope you get the help you need. There was a girl in my boarding school who had a personality disorder, so I know a bit about it, and it's dead serious. If you're anything like her, you'll never, EVER be happy in life unless you seriously get help for this! Really I wish you all the best, but it's up to you obviously, your choice. Everyone's right, you need more help than can be had here on the forum. I hope you get it, I really do.
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