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Member Conduct

Discussion in 'Social' started by anthony, Nov 20, 2006.

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  1. anthony

    anthony Silently Watching Founder

    As an example of recent events, this is the exact display that I will not tolerate on this forum, being JoannaG's recent behaviour.

    Joanna posts about my responses to her private messages, gets on here drunk, distorted, suicidal, and so the list goes on.

    Joanna mentioned to some that I was pissed at her. Yes, I was, and the reason I was is for this exact behaviour that is occuring, all of which I personally find quite disruptive, and so do other members from the messages I receive.

    Joanna told me that I am not here enough for Joanna, that I do not spend enough time on here helping Joanna, and so forth. Yes, that does piss me off under the current circumstances within my life, being a new birth. I personally think, "how fu*ken rude of a person to tell me I am not here enough for them when my wife is giving birth." Yes, that did piss me off.

    I have discussed this with members already, left it open for anyone to have their say in regard to conduct on this forum, and that end result was posted for all members and then new members during the registration process. JoannaG has not given an ounce of conduct in regard to that discussion, so I have not given an ounce of remorse to JoannaG.

    I can tolerate anger, agression towards me, drunkeness and so forth, when the person knows that they are doing wrong and really wants to help themselves. In this case, I do not see JoannaG actively wanting to help herself, so I have placed Joanna into moderation until such time as Joanna wants to conform to the conduct of this forum, as we all do, respect others and show a little dignity towards one another.
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  3. goingonhope

    goingonhope Member Premium Member

    Probably don’t have any right to comment on this whatsoever, as I do only want to be helpful, and not offer opinions, on matters where they might be less than constructive or unappreciated. If I’m unhelpful in adding what’s on my mind concerning this please than just let me know.

    First, I like to say JoannaG. You’re freely being given great support. No one here is rejecting, shortchanging, or denying you. It may be that your PTSD and alcohol combined are creating such (innocent) distortions, but profound distortions in your thinking, none-the-less. This is all o.k., provided we’ all learn while protecting the integrity of this forum, Each member and its viewers.

    JoannaG, you’re a member, among many, and I do hope you too accept the Real help and suggestions offered. And, believe me, all of this real help, probably isn’t going to go over well with you. Little, to none of it, may look like it’ s what’s really going to help you, but if accepted, it can be what turns your life around heading you in the right direction. I personally, know JoannaG, because I habitually chose what I thought was best for me, for far too long, and this resulted in me creating my own (very serious), self-imposed problems. And, then I’d feel angry, hostile, may even blame others. I do hope you continue, taking new and unfamiliar suggestive steps, all in order to help yourself.

    And, second, JoannaG, I’ve never once PM or spoke with anyone regarding this concern, due to my own lack of self-esteem, but please believe this decision to put you back into moderation for the time being, is in my opinion from my observations, experienced and wise, and of some real help to you while protecting the conduct and integrity of the forum.

    Anthony, throughout everything wonderful in your life today, and despite this unnecessary harassment and challenge, you’re doing simply wonderful. I think I speak for many, we so appreciate you.

    Now a tid-bit of my own personal insecurity…..hey, this is what I think and have to say on this subject….certainly hesistant to post, as I find myself still very much afraid of how other’s interpret what I say, as I’ve long-lived with people who chronically perceived my input, what I’ve said, thought or felt, distortedly and always, on my back, unappreciative, and unforgiving. Well, here goes anyhow, ’What doesn’t kill me, will make me stronger.” huh.
    My best to All!…….sincerely, goingonhope
  4. anthony

    anthony Silently Watching Founder

    Hope, I must say thank you for your lovely support. I think you said that so so well, and to be honest, your input is always welcomed and appreciated.

    Joanna is upset with me from private conversations, but I expected that. Joanna just needs to get Joanna some professional help to get started on the right track, or atleast be dedicated to wanting to help herself. Nobody can be helped who doesn't want to be, or allow others too. As unfortunate as that is, that is PTSD.

    For those that PM'd me about this matter, thank you also for your support.

    Joanna... the door is always open for you here, and I am always accepting of people. I gave you rope, you hung yourself, so be it... when your ready to help yourself, I and I'm pretty sure I can speak for most, in saying that everyone here will gladly support and help you when your honestly ready to be helped. You can get angry and upset, or you can simply just accept that you have been a pain in the behind with your drinking and posting, help yourself get past the alcohol and into really helping yourself.

    I do not know whether my decision was right or wrong, because its not about that. What I feel is that I had to do this at present in order to protect those who are already suffering pain from possibly being provoked in the wrong ways, instead of the right.

    If I made a bad decision, I am more than happy to admit it... prove me wrong Joanna!
  5. becvan

    becvan Queen of the Blunt! Premium Member

    Okay, what the heck did I miss??? I'm going to go and read away but what happened??? Never doubt you great job Anthony.. never.

    *grumbles about leaving and missing all hell breaking loose... LOL*

  6. anthony

    anthony Silently Watching Founder

    Oh not much... just a few hickups with Joanna in regard to posting when drunk, posting parts of private messages from other responses, etc etc...
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