My adult children can't get along after abuse ended 4 years ago from their Dad.

Roxinator

New Here
My adult daughters can't get along because of PTSD symptoms.They're my only family. I'm getting depressed. The abuse ended 4 years ago. I bought a condo last year, I'm retired and happy except I have no family left it seems. My birthday is Halloween, the holidays are coming. I just started to learn to cook and I was anticipating a wonderful life cooking for them. I'm completely crushed and heartbroken. I'm not going to decorate or do anything for my birthday or the holidays. I give up.
 

arfie

MyPTSD Pro
hello roxinator. welcome to the forum. love your username. empowering in a fun sort of way. for my gk's, i call myself, "the gaminator. resistance is futile. you will be gaminated."

anyhoo. . . getting back on topic. . .

4 years isn't a long time in a healing journey. i hope you will be gentle with all the players involved and patient with the healing process. maybe for now you can entertain your daughters separately? above all, don't give up.

steadying support while you work it through. i hope you'll feel safe to sort those issues here. vent freely. vent often.
 

Roxinator

New Here
hello roxinator. welcome to the forum. love your username. empowering in a fun sort of way. for my gk's, i call myself, "the gaminator. resistance is futile. you will be gaminated."

anyhoo. . . getting back on topic. . .

4 years isn't a long time in a healing journey. i hope you will be gentle with all the players involved and patient with the healing process. maybe for now you can entertain your daughters separately? above all, don't give up.

steadying support while you work it through. i hope you'll feel safe to sort those issues here. vent freely. vent often.
Thank you very much. I have been seeing them separately. But I hardly ever see my older daughter.
...With my new condo and a new life, I'm just so sad that I can't share it with my older daughter as well. It feels really empty since it's been a year now that the two of them have been having problems.
...I'm 63 I'm not getting any younger... All the 8 vacations that my younger one and I have taken this past year, have created so many new memories. But the older one just lives in the past and has no idea how much better we've become. And she will never know because she doesn't see us.
... The longest she stays away from us the less I think about her because it's just hurts and I don't like to feel this way.
... I'm healthy and active and I just feel like time is going to pass and my health isn't going to be well at some point in and we will have missed the opportunity to do so much together and make them memories.
... Btw, My friends gave me this name Roxinator because I deal with people in disagreements without swearing, getting upset, I just stay focused on the topic and I win every time.lol
... I lost my mother to Alzheimer's and my stepdad a little over a year ago. I was their caretaker the last year and a half of their lives. And I miss them so much but I know that they had a good life at 89 and 91. Just a month before I got them into the nursing homes They were living at home in their own house.
... My brother tricked them into signing a new estate and will that made him and his son get everything that they had, a half a million. Neither my brother or his son ever even hardly called them and never came to see them And they only live less than a half hour away.
... I've got past all that because I know I'm a better person and so does God.
... I've disowned my brother. And all I got left is me and my two daughters. Nothing seems right anymore.


...
 

Weemie

MyPTSD Pro
Everyone heals at their own pace. Your daughters and yourself were all present during that period of abuse so it's going to take time for them to be able to integrate new experiences absent of it. All you can do is offer support, unfortunately.
 

Roxinator

New Here
Everyone heals at their own pace. Your daughters and yourself were all present during that period of abuse so it's going to take time for them to be able to integrate new experiences absent of it. All you can do is offer support, unfortunately.
Thank you 💓

@Roxinator Just to clarify… Do all 3 of you have PTSD?
Yes. I only get triggered if someone yells at me. Sometimes when my younger one has an anxiety attack it triggers me. My doctor prescribes me 30 xanax every 6 months. I only use it when she has a bad attack. I always have leftovers.
... I keep all stress away as much as possible and never worry about everyday small stuff. I'm very chill.
 
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