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Message: <blockquote data-quote="RussellSue" data-source="post: 1696879" data-attributes="member: 45309">If it's worth it to the both of you to do couple's therapy, then that's certainly one option. It sounds like he isn't being able to fully communicate with you what he is going through. On the other hand, I had a boyfriend get upset with me one day, leave the house and never call that evening though he had promised he would. I spent my whole evening terrified that something had happened to him - in absolute misery. I left him the next day because I figured that was a shitty thing to do to a woman who had already buried two men and because I came to the conclusion that his ongoing lack of sensitivity toward my trauma was not going to end. This was not the first relationship I was in where my anxiety and trauma was treated like it was a non-issue. One was with a guy with bipolar and the truth is he probably couldn't have stopped himself from causing me panic but it still made for an unworkable situation, even if I did empathize with his mood problems. It really wouldn't have mattered if I'd met someone with trauma identical to my own that I could completely understand and empathize with: if we couldn't make it peacefully, we would have had to split. Frankly, I've been through too much to have the one safe person I think I might get to have in life turn out to feel unsafe due to abuse, chronic arguments or constant lack of consideration.</blockquote>