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My dad died

Discussion in 'Death' started by Cannottakethis, Jan 16, 2018.

  1. Cannottakethis

    Cannottakethis Well-Known Member

    he was my hero.
    It’s been so hard since the funeral and now the mourning.
    What has been so amazing is that all of these people that came to the funeral and are coming to my moms house for the mourning period. All love my father so much and keep telling me how great he was. I knew he was great but I didn’t know how many other people’s lives he had touched. It is great, but it is making me even more sad. I’m going home tonight to decompress, and probably take off a few more days so I can get my head together and get ready to go back to work. I didn’t even know how hard this would be even knowing that he was so sick and was going to die doesn’t prepare you.
    I’m putting my speech that I said at his funeral into this because it’s deserves to be read by as many people as possible. My dad was amusing and I loved him so much.

    Bert was my dad and he was the best.

    As a little girl my dad taught me to swim, ride a bike, and to dive without holding my nose. He loved our pool and would come home from work at night in the summer and take a quick dip.

    Having a family of females, my dad took his role of the man of the family seriously. He was the bug killer, heavy lifter and taker of cars to get them fixed. Daddy was the one we all went to for questions about anything. And he always knew the answer.

    If you knew my dad, you know he loved to talk about 2 things.

    The Weather


    As a kid my dad taught me to look at The leaves on the trees to tell how cold it was outside. He was the person I asked what the weather was, instead of looking at a thermometer or turning on the TV. He had no need for an alarm clock, he just woke up on time every day and woke me up for school every morning if I wasn’t up already.

    My dad loved his Mets and would watch baseball, football or basically any sport that was on TV. He loved to talk about sports and would start a conversation with anybody about a recent game. I would sit and watch baseball with him, get Mets tickets for him and go with him to games just so I could spend extra time with him.

    We would stop at diners on the way, and he would eat things that my mother would never let him eat, and it would be our secret.

    Later in life we started going to blue claws games and my dad was pretty famous at the stadium. We went to an opening game and everybody knew him and were so happy to see him when he we got there.

    When my dad was working, he worked hard. As a little girl he would let me fill out order forms for him. He taught me the value of a strong work ethic. And when I asked him “Daddy what are you going to do when you retire?“ He said, I’m going to work. And soon enough he retired, took some time off, and went back to work. And that made him happy. He spent time at home with my mom, and he went to work a few days a week and felt productive and good about himself. My dad liked to have something to do, and have a purpose. My parents had a great life together. My friends loved hanging out with my parents. When we were all in Jamaica together my dad was in the pool at the pool bar with all of my friends doing shots getting drunk and having a great time.

    My dad never met a stranger, he could talk to anybody And he was extremely likable guy.He was kind, calming, and a gentle man and a gentleman.

    He treated my mom better than any husband I’ve ever seen treat a wife, and they’re 53 year marriage proves that. He is an exemplary husband father and grandfather. There is a large hole in many hearts with his absence.

    Anyone who got to be in my dads presence was better for it.

    My family and I are so grateful to everyone who is here today to not only say goodbye to my father but also to celebrate the amazing man he was when he was alive.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 16, 2018
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  3. berlinda

    berlinda Was Bearlinda Premium Member Donated

    I'm so sorry for your loss @Cannottakethis He sounds a lovely Dad. I know how hard it is having lost mine 18 months ago.
    Best to you
    Last edited: Jan 16, 2018
    Cannottakethis, ladee and Rain like this.
  4. LuckiLee

    LuckiLee I'm a VIP

    That made me teary eyed! You could have been describing my Dad. We are blessed to have such amazing men for Fathers. Condolences to you and your family!
    Cannottakethis, ladee and Rain like this.
  5. Xena

    Xena Well-Known Member

    Hi @Cannottakethis.. I'm so sorry about you dad.
    I liked what you wrote about him... He sounds amazing...

    Your grieving and its another tough battle to face.. And it's a long battle too....

    You will get through this... The pain lessens with time... I always think of the good times when I lost my friend at 26... Or my nanna...

    I wasn't myself for a long time afterward. I'm sure there are support groups for grief when you are ready.
    Big hugs......
    Cannottakethis and Rain like this.
  6. ShikibuZ

    ShikibuZ Policy Enforcement Banned Premium Member

    My deepest condolences. Thank you for sharing your beautiful speech. Be gentle with yourself as grief unravels...
    Cannottakethis and Rain like this.
  7. Rain

    Rain To have hope is a choice Banned Premium Member Generous $250+

    I am so sorry, I cannot imagine the depth of your grief.:hug:
    Cannottakethis likes this.
  8. Zoogal

    Zoogal I'm a VIP

    I am so sorry. I didn't really have a dad so my grandpa filled that role. When he died I was crushed. I know what you mean by you're never prepared. Hugs and prayers if you want them
    Cannottakethis likes this.
  9. Tornadic Thoughts

    Tornadic Thoughts I'm a VIP

    (((Heart Hugs)))
    Cannottakethis likes this.
  10. She Cat

    She Cat Policy Enforcement Banned Premium Member Sponsor $100+

    I’m so sorry..... your description of your dad was so heartwarming. Remember that he is and will always be looking out for you...
    Cannottakethis likes this.
  11. AngelkeeperJ

    AngelkeeperJ ❣️ Blessed❣️ Premium Member Generous $250+

    I am SO sorry for your loss! You are right... There is no way to be prepared to lose the man that you loved and adored!

    You have wonderful memories to hold close to your heart, to comfort you in the days, weeks, months, and years to come.

    Let yourself feel, cry, and allow yourself LOTS of time. Grief does not have rules, nor any timeline.

    Blessings of peace to you and your loved ones! Your Dad was an AWESOME MAN, it's obvious in your words.
    Cannottakethis likes this.
  12. AngelkeeperJ

    AngelkeeperJ ❣️ Blessed❣️ Premium Member Generous $250+

    I don't know your beliefs when it comes to heaven, but there's an AWESOME song by Guy Penrod on YouTube. "Knowing What I Know About Heaven."
    It may make you cry, but that's not a bad thing! We who love deeply, grieve deeply... I wouldn't have it any other way.
    Just a thought..
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