My dad's hands



I have such a lovely and understanding boyfriend.
But my dad used to molest me.
My boyfriend has the same color skin of my dad.
Sometimes when he touches me it reminds me of my dad's hands. It's causing me so much emotional pain and I just want to move past this. My dad is still messing up my life even though I don't really see him anymore. I can't get away from the pain he caused me


I am sorry, so sorry for your pain.
For me, time, therapy and learning to manage the waves of emotions allowed some distance. I offer the following respectfully... it is important to grieve the loss of so many components of normalcy but the trick for me was to not become additionally sad ‘over being saddened’. Then the momentum becomes a rabbit hole of depression versus processing.

Yes, you offer truth. We pay for our fathers’ perversions in so many ways but we deserve a life that allows trust as well as healthy love. May you find yours.