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My longtime therapist has moved out of state

Thread starter #1
Hi everyone, I’m new here and thankful to have found a supportive place to share my thoughts and advice with others. Just recently my therapist of many years moved out of state. We are continuing therapy with the use of telehealth, but it’s just not the same and I find myself missing our connection. I struggle with dissociation, even when in the office and the switch to online counseling has been a challenge. Any advice or suggestions in how to grieve this change would be greatly respected and appreciated.
Thank you!
 
#2
Hi @Hopebroadway ! Welcome!
So sorry to hear your T has moved away. That must be really tough.

My therapy moved online since the pandemic. It took me a few sessions to get into it. But it works well for me. I disassociate too.

I think what works for me is that I felt in control of the move to online. I asked for it the week before the lockdown happened and she said it was going to be her last in person session anyway. So for me, it's how it has been framed that helped a lot. Is there a way of trying to reframe what has happened to help you feel more in control or more of a conscious choice in some way?

My T sits really close to the camera. So all I see is her face really. That really helps, particularly when I'm disassociating.

It also took her a while to pick up cues online. But now, she can immediately see my emotional state.

What in particular are you finding challenging?
And how many sessions have you had online? If it's just a small amount, maybe it's still getting used to it? It is a big change.
 
#3
Any advice or suggestions in how to grieve this change would be greatly respected and appreciated.
An upside would be that ANY therapist you’d be seeing, right now, would most likely be via Telehealth. Small rooms & close quarters pretty much guarantees transmission, so very very few therapists are risking it.

Which means... on the subject of grieving... that you have this time together via Telehealth to transition. Rather than simply having to shift gears and find a new therapist, you get this time with your old one, until such a time as you can find a new in-person therapist.

Not at all dissimilar to someone you love being diagnosed with cancer, and having 6-12mo really revel in spending time with them / the chance to say goodbye... vs ...finding out someone you love died in a car crash an hour ago. Grief is in both processes; the prolonged and the sudden.

((Except, you know, your therapist isn’t dying; and you can think happily on them living their life out of state.))
 
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