Jessica Tie
New Here
Hi my name is Jessica. Around the time when I was 8 or 9 my dad was disgnosed with cancer. I was to young to understand but I never that that I would have lost my father. A couple years later when I'm 11 just had surgery on both my feet. A couple weeks later my dad was in the hospital because he was to sick to stay home but he was with my step mom. He died. But on the night he dies I saw him in a dream that night. I woke up so scared and confused and told myself it was just a dream. so texted my step mom and she told me that it was true. I was so sad and scared but I couldn't cry and I didn't know why. I guess I was all cried out from the "dream". When it was time for his funeral I cried my eyes out because I loved my dad so much and my dad loved me so much and we had so many great memories. I was scared to lose those. Now that I'm a little older I became so depressed and I get there terrible nightmares of my dad dying and of him hating me. It stresses me out soooo much and I can't stop myself from these nightmares. I loved my dad from the moon and back ( that is what he would say to me ) and I'm so scared that he hates me now because my mom tells me that he would because i died my hair to dark brown and not keeping blonde because she tells me that I was his favorite because I was his only kid that looked like him with blonde hair and blue eyes. Im scared that he's punishing me with making me watch him re dying over and over again. someone Please help me with whats happening!