My parents frightens me

alli

New Here
My parents are mismatched in all possible ways. They don't love each other, never cherish each other . MY father is a very demanding person. He wants everything the way he wants. He never compromises, never allow anything that's not as per his plan. He makes me feel miserable. I am 25 years old and I still feel like I am helpless 10 year old kid. And I am so ashamed that I can't speak for myself. I feel like such a coward. He is really intimidating and I am afraid that he would really get mad if I am try to speak my mind. My mother is so focused on her fights with him. She wants to prove her point, comes out as a winner. It's always their fights she is focused on. The whole pandemic thing has trapped me at home. Is this normal? Not being able to talk... being such a coward?
 

PTSDisaster

Learning
First of all, please stop saying you're a coward. You are not a coward, you're in fact very strong for posting here and talking about your issues.

I don't think it's not normal that you have troubles speaking your mind with this kind of situation at home. I'm moved out about 2,5 years ago and I still have trouble speaking with my father because he was so demanding/powerful. It's totally normal to feel this way because you have the age to speak your own mind, have your own thoughts etc.. But you can't because of your demanding father.
Are you in therapy? And you still live at home?

For me things started developing in the way I speak to my father when I moved out and went to therapy. But it's a learning process that takes a lot of time since you've been in this situation all your life. You've got to figure out the way yóu want to live and not the way he demands you to.

Hold on, stay strong, find help and don't blame everything on yourself please

<3
 

alli

New Here
First of all, please stop saying you're a coward. You are not a coward, you're in fact very strong for posting here and talking about your issues.

I don't think it's not normal that you have troubles speaking your mind with this kind of situation at home. I'm moved out about 2,5 years ago and I still have trouble speaking with my father because he was so demanding/powerful. It's totally normal to feel this way because you have the age to speak your own mind, have your own thoughts etc.. But you can't because of your demanding father.
Are you in therapy? And you still live at home?

For me things started developing in the way I speak to my father when I moved out and went to therapy. But it's a learning process that takes a lot of time since you've been in this situation all your life. You've got to figure out the way yóu want to live and not the way he demands you to.

Hold on, stay strong, find help and don't blame everything on yourself please

<3
Thank you for your kind response. I was away from home during my PG studies.. I have a job now. Which is in another state. It's work from home now and it's been more than a year now. I am thinking of seeing someone - a professional. But I was not sure about it.. I have a lot to figure out, I guess. I am so glad that your are at a better position.. Thank you again for your kind words and sharing your story
 

DharmaGirl

MyPTSD Pro
Are you here because you have PTSD? There are many behaviors within the realm of normal so it would be hard to say. If you don't like the circumstances of where you live you are an adult and can get your own place, or move in with friends. You can choose to stay, and learn how to deal with your feelings, or find another place to live. If you are looking for ways to be able to communicate better with your parents, perhaps a interpersonal communications class would help, or group therapy.
 
Top