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My PTSD - Unbeknownst To Myself

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Barbo, Aug 10, 2007.

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  1. Barbo

    Barbo New Member

    Greetings to everyone,
    I was diagnosed with PTSD last year. I was in a clinic for alcoholics and saw a phychotherpaist every day. I did not even know I had such until I read the report when I was released.
    Yes I am haunted by things..... things that go way back to childhood, things as new as the last two years, nearly drowning twice, collapsing twice and not being able to move or breather or various other things. Having been in a bad relationship with a man whom thought he was the second Christ and a few other large bumps like being screamed at for a few years.......... the list goes on so I could accept my wine drinking and depression, etc........... but what do I do with this whole PTSD thing? I am a happy person but I do suffer with things. My latests is fears of having collapsed...... I can not swallow all of of a sudden, I get numb feelings and a terrible panic........... all of which I sit through and say nothing. Often I just make myself get up and go to the toilet, something to do that is normal, tell myself to stop it, get a grip, ground myself.
    I am afraid of people although I am very outgoing.
    I am tired of it all and I know live abroad in a country where I don't really have the language so I can not go for therapy and I do not like medication as I have a phobia about that too.
    So this is my introduction but truly, I am a happy person full of life.
    Best wishes to all
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  3. permban0077

    permban0077 Policy Enforcement Banned

    Welcome to the forum. You will see here that you are certainly not alone and many here suffer many of the same symptoms. There is a lot of information here to help you learn to recover.
  4. anthony

    anthony Donate To Keep MyPTSD Founder

    Welcome to the forum barpo...
  5. She Cat

    She Cat Policy Enforcement Banned Premium Member Sponsor $100+

    Welcome to the forum....Tons of info and good people too.

  6. goingonhope

    goingonhope Member Premium Member

    Hello,:hello: Barbo and Welcome to the forum.

    Wow, reading your post was a bit eerie for me, bc I so much identify. With me, I had a chronic dependence upon alcohol and I attempted to accept that many yrs. ago, but found myself desperately in need of something which "I thought" would continue to help ease, or improve or evaporate my PTSD symptoms. I wanted in to treat and make the symptoms, pain and trauma all go away. In time, it only made things worse for me. I've since concluded that I now have an allergy to alcohol and fortunately haven't taken a drink in over ten yrs. now.

    I so relate, I too am afraid of people, though I can be very outgoing. And, I too do not like medications and have a phobia of them. All the symptoms you've mentioned I can identify with at one time or another too. And, it was in treating, a pretty large dependence for me, that of my drinking problem, that I discovered that I had PTSD.



    veiled, couldn't have said it any better. We certainly are no longer alone, here.

    My best to you Barbo, and I really do hope you find, learn much more about yourself, and actively always continue... continue... continue to examine, deal and cope with healing from your traumas.

    Again, Welcome Aboard !

  7. goingonhope

    goingonhope Member Premium Member

    Just wanted to add something......

    Oh' ya', in this process we get to juggle, balance and live our lives. And, again be the happy, good people that so many of us truly are.

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