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General My Step Dad's PTSD

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Marilyn_S

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My step dad, whom I call daddy, has PTSD from his tour in Veitnam. He doesn't like talking about it and he is so painfully humble about his accomplishments. He won awards for sharp shooter and was raised to the rank of corporal. It usually doesn't bother him too much untill the 4th of July when people shoot off fire works. He jerks, gets real nervous and fpr weeks will have a hard time sleeping. He told me it was because the fire works reminded him so much of the mortar rounds that would go off over his head all the time. He talks to me about his experiences but he won't talk to anybody else in the family. He acts like he's ashamed that it still causes him to miss sleep and that he still has problems. I so much understand him. I don't know if I make it worse for him when I call him my hero but that is the way I feel. He is a war hero! I am very proud of him because of his bravery and his ability to stay alive in such an aweful place. He's told me how he watched his friends get killed and about the hand to hand combat in the jungle. He admits that he was so scared at times he just about wet himself. Anybody got any words of advise for me in helping my daddy. Perhaps I should just be a good listener.
 
Welcome to the forum AdaRuth. Lovely to have you.

Perhaps I should just be a good listener.

Yes, I believe this is key - if you already share a rapport with him and he opens up to you, that is a marvelous way to help him. Talking openly about matters is very important to those with PTSD, as I'm sure you're aware, having PTSD yourself. Only remember to take care of yourself as well. Your stepfather is indeed a war hero and I am delighted you see him as such. Take care.
 
Sometimes, I bring up the war and ask dad questions about his experiences. He bashfully chuckles and turns red faced. He always says that he is just a common person and all he did was try to stay alive and not go crazy. Is it bad for me to ask him questions? He seems to always answer, especially when my mother stays out of the conversation. Mom acts a little jelous sometimes because he tells me things he hasn't even told her. Mom will not let me tell him about my PTSD and why I have it, but its like dad somehow knows there is not all to mom's stories than meets the eye. She's kind of mean to him sometimes. He so much doesn't deserve that. I don't know, I just hope I'm doing the right things because I love my daddy. I was an adult when he and mother married but he is more of a dad to me than my real dad was ever possibly even capable of. Any thoughts are welcomed. Marilyn S.
 
Marilyn, if you are concerned about the questions hurting him, I would simply ask him, Dad, is it all right to talk to you about these matters and ask you questions? If he says yes, then ask away in my opinion. You have his permission in that case. Evidently he enjoys talking about things, and seems to share a special rapport with you.
 
Thanks Kathy, that helps. I will ask him. Isn't it funny how sometimes the answers are so simple but yet so hard to think of in the midst of things? lol!
 
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