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My therapist won't give me an appointment. Lacks consistency

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GalwayGirl

New Here
Hi everyone

I'm thinking on finding a new therapist, I just feel like the current one is super busy (he sees like 7- 9 clients a day) and I need to be consistent and feel secure to be able to get better.

I wrote here before, my therapist told me more than 3 weeks ago that in order for us to have our next session I needed to tell him by email difficult things I couldn't say in session (we've only had 6 session since January) it's my first time going to therapy so I really don't know how this functions.

I was able to write an email, which was super difficult for me and I felt pressured to this in order to continue with my session, and after some days he replied and told me he was able to work with me on these things, because asked him if he could help or I needed to find a different therapist in case he does not works with CSA trauma and emotional abuse.
Then he said that we could work these situations by email (which was weird for me) and I told him I needed normal sessions then he suggested to work via email and videocalls. Since this happened two weeks ago he has not given me any appointment and two days ago he sent me a text sayin " hi, How are you" and I replied thinking he would finally give me an appointment for a session and he hasn't replied in two days! I think this is not professional, the last time we had session was march 1st and I told him I have insomnia, panic attacks and suicidal thoughts. I just feel like he does not care and this is affecting a lot since I can't sleep and feel very sad not being able to continue with therapy
I would prefer he is sincere and tell me he has a lot of clients and he won't have the time to see me instead on having me waiting and not being consistent since I'm not okay at all.

What I wanted to ask is , do you think I'm overreacting or is this normal at all? The only thing I know is that this does not make me feel good specially because I've always thought I don't deserve help or maybe I'm super dramatic with my life story even though I've suffered from abuse in my childhood and teenage years and recently as an adult. I just feel like no one cares and why would a therapist care...

Thanks for reading
 
Oh gosh!
Everything you are feeling is totally understandable.
.you know what you need: regular sessions.
He isn't providing that.
So, to have what you need, sound spoke having a new therapist is the way to go.
Staying with him means a process that you're saying doesn't work for you. And that's ok to say and it's ok to find a new therapist.


Also, I think it is extremely professional unethical to get someone to write out their traumas like that and then effectively leave them to it. Trauma therapy over email?!
Sorry, I am outraged on your behalf so prov need to reign that in.
 
Thank you all for replying. He even blocked me from WhatsApp I was never disrespectful or crossed any boundaries with him. I barely can talk about what I feel, this just sucks I really can't understand how some people can practise this profession like this.
 
I had a bad therapist that discounted my experiences, told me to just give my ex what he wanted (sex) to keep the peace. Cancelled on me last minute. Cancelled 15 minutes into an appointment. Bad boundaries. He was gross.

It is hard to move on, but you can do it. I agree about reporting him. This is all on him. I feel angry on your behalf.
 
Thank you all for replying. He even blocked me from WhatsApp I was never disrespectful or crossed any boundaries with him. I barely can talk about what I feel, this just sucks I really can't understand how some people can practise this profession like this.
You absolutely did not do anything to deserve to be treated this way by him. This is all on him, and nothing you did.
He sounds extremely unethical and if you feel up to it I would encourage you to try and report him to whichever professional body he’s licensed under.
There are some really good therapists out there who will be able to help you, in a respectful and ethical manner, I’m sorry that your first experience has been a really sucky one.
 
Hi everyone

I'm thinking on finding a new therapist, I just feel like the current one is super busy (he sees like 7- 9 clients a day) and I need to be consistent and feel secure to be able to get better.

I wrote here before, my therapist told me more than 3 weeks ago that in order for us to have our next session I needed to tell him by email difficult things I couldn't say in session (we've only had 6 session since January) it's my first time going to therapy so I really don't know how this functions.

I was able to write an email, which was super difficult for me and I felt pressured to this in order to continue with my session, and after some days he replied and told me he was able to work with me on these things, because asked him if he could help or I needed to find a different therapist in case he does not works with CSA trauma and emotional abuse.
Then he said that we could work these situations by email (which was weird for me) and I told him I needed normal sessions then he suggested to work via email and videocalls. Since this happened two weeks ago he has not given me any appointment and two days ago he sent me a text sayin " hi, How are you" and I replied thinking he would finally give me an appointment for a session and he hasn't replied in two days! I think this is not professional, the last time we had session was march 1st and I told him I have insomnia, panic attacks and suicidal thoughts. I just feel like he does not care and this is affecting a lot since I can't sleep and feel very sad not being able to continue with therapy
I would prefer he is sincere and tell me he has a lot of clients and he won't have the time to see me instead on having me waiting and not being consistent since I'm not okay at all.

What I wanted to ask is , do you think I'm overreacting or is this normal at all? The only thing I know is that this does not make me feel good specially because I've always thought I don't deserve help or maybe I'm super dramatic with my life story even though I've suffered from abuse in my childhood and teenage years and recently as an adult. I just feel like no one cares and why would a therapist care...

Thanks for reading
Sometimes therapists test boundaries and see if you will speak up and speak your needs directly. They also will test how you handle uncertainty, etc. But you should never feel pushed to comply with something not right for you. I think he pushed your boundaries. I would find someone who at least makes you feel comfortable and heard for those extremely traumatic things you want to resolve.im so sorry for your pain. I hope it all turns around.
 
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