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Childhood New Body Memories?

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SinkorSwim

MyPTSD Pro
So I can't help think that these two are related in someway. Monday night I went for a run on a city street by myself. I was called out by a guy sitting on his front porch. He said hey girl you are looking hot tonight, and then said what no response back? I just ran passed and tried not to let it bug me. Immediately my legs just tensed up. My legs felt like bricks and started to burn, literally after the run I could not walk it felt like I ran a marathon and I only ran 3 miles. I am a childhood sexual abuse survivor and one of my triggers is being hit on by guys. Yesterday during therapy I was doing some EMDR around a different childhood trauma and I felt my legs burning again. I thought maybe it had to do with my extra running lately and my body was just getting used to putting on more miles. However, I ran further last night a more hilly course and ran faster with two other people and I had no issues with my legs at all. I can't help but think that the burning muscle pain has something to do with my past. I have not really had any body sensations in the past so I am wondering if this could possibly be some new body memories?
 
It sounds very feasible doesn't it. With both happening at the same time as something related to your past like that..and as you say, not having that issue another time when there was nothing to trigger such a response and it seems clear it wasn't the exercise as you were able to run without problems another day.

Have you had new body memories happen before? And brought on by stuff that brings up your past?
 
It sounds very feasible doesn't it. With both happening at the same time as something related to your past like that..and as you say, not having that issue another time when there was nothing to trigger such a response and it seems clear it wasn't the exercise as you were able to run without problems another day.

Have you had new body memories happen before? And brought on by stuff that brings up your past?

No I haven't really had any body memories before, or I guess maybe I had them I just really never put 2 and 2 together.
 
I don't have any body memories but the men that say that are just warning you. ( it makes me cringe) Maybe about the neighborhood? But if they get a reaction ( and you) it's a bonus. Were you ganged upon, in a fight, sometime in your lifetime?

He said hey girl you are looking hot tonight, and then said what no response back? I just ran passed and tried not to let it bug me. Immediately my legs just tensed up
 
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Clearly, being "hit-on" is a trigger, and as a result your body reacted. I don't think this is necessarily a body memory; just my opinion, take it for what it's worth.

Whenever I experience a trigger, my body reacts. I have had a tendency to freeze during assaults. So, when I get triggered, I tend to get that heavy feeling in my limbs, like you described.

For me, body memories are physical sensations from being strangled, raped, and otherwise assaulted.

I hope my explanation of my experience helps you better understand your own experience. Everyone is an individual, so maybe for you it was a body memory. Either way, I think it's good that you are aware your body's response to a possible threat.

Are you seeing a counselor, who can help you work through this stuff? If not, it might be worth considering.
 
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