Sufferer New - Just Joined After My Search Engine Brought Me Here

Georgianne12

Not Active
Hi everyone. Thanks ahead of time for your help. I searched nightmares/prevention online and found you all. I was diagnosed with PTSD 25 yrs ago and lived a somewhat functional/ well life until recently. I have come full circle back to nightmare mode after a recent severe head injury at work that has resulted in horrible headaches 24/7.

Many of your stories are similar to mine. I am a teacher but have worked other jobs in the past. Our local insurance group cancelled on the teachers in our state during covid, so I am without insurance, but have workers comp for the head injury. It limits my help. So I am here to help myself and see how you are all coping/healing. Perhaps to vent a bit - maybe a lot.

I grew up in a home with many mental illnesses, abuses, etc. and learned to be a caretaker of others. I learned to duck and cover and not to bring my problems to anyone. My PTSD came on after a physical attack 25 years ago, but I feel like I was anti-social before this. I am divorced (8 yrs), super private, and mentally unhinged. I don't abuse anyone or lash out. I love to laugh and I am a good friend and listener.

My daughter is still with me and going to college while I provide a home for her. Recently, she is helping me around the house and I feel uncomfortable switching the roles and accepting her help with dishes, shopping, etc. I need to get my crap together, she is doing great in college and I don't want to sink her boat with my growing problems.

The neurologist is good, but not hearing me when I say I can't sleep, am having nightmares, and daymares. I leave the house in short stints, like an angry raccoon. My goal is to get things done and get back to my house / safe haven. On the outside I am a super patient caring person, inside I am mad as hell and everyone seems to be doing "it" wrong, it being life.

I am aware enough to realize that the sleep issue is driving my major inability to function. I need to get this fixed before I can tackle the other stuff. My TBI scares me. I am reluctant to explore sleep meds on my own, but I am desperate to find a working solution. Any suggestions are welcome. My nightmares are severe and are now visiting me when I am awake or just going to bed.

The nightmare that brought me here: A room full of huge overly furry cats, sitting everywhere, dark black and brown fur, maybe 50 of them squeezed into my bedroom. Nothing particularly horrifying except that I felt fur on my face, woke up and saw them. I was wide awake and couldnt move for a few minutes. Then got up finally and ran to the living room screaming to my daughter. We have no pets. Nobody was shot, stabbed, etc... in this dream, but I couldn't go back in my room. This happens every night, WTH?

I consider myself a bit of a tough lady. I have been lowered into an archeological cave to dig out a skeleton, dragged through a zoo cage by an angry chimp, and a myriad of other things that didn't give me nightmares. Why now? Schizophrenia? Reading all your posts.

Thanks for sharing your lives, questions, and answers,
G
 

Freddyt

MyPTSD Pro
Welcome Georgieanne12

You came here the same way I did. This is a great place for finding help dealing with the day to day screwed upness of PTSD. There are many kind and wonderful people here.

Are you in any kind of therapy for your PTSD?
 

Georgianne12

Not Active
Welcome Georgieanne12

You came here the same way I did. This is a great place for finding help dealing with the day to day screwed upness of PTSD. There are many kind and wonderful people here.

Are you in any kind of therapy for your PTSD?
Thanks so much Freddy, not it therapy again yet... still hunting for an affordable answer.

Welcome from another FNG..
Thanks Jafo.
 

Agita Kaput

Policy Enforcement
Sponsor
not it therapy again yet... still hunting for an affordable answer.

I came here the same way you guys did... all of you. I'm sure of this. Trust me.

I play a therapist on TV... so ignore everything I say.

1. Get an audible account;

2. During the day, listen to Pete Walker's Complex PTSD.
Pay attention.

3. As you attempt to fall asleep, listen to Marshall Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication.
Don't pay attention.

4. The New Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain (or get the book!)

Find the bit about drawing an upside-down picture or a crumpled piece of paper... one of them.
DO Follow these instructions (the author knows what she is talking about)
DON'T learn to draw or think about learning to draw, or anything like that - if you do, make sure you do it wrong.
These exercises are going to help you stop thinking (in a good way) not draw.
The exercises should be done for (make up some amount of time here) minutes
every time you start to feel your worst.

If you think something about not doing it right
or hear yourself saying, "Georgianne you're all f**ed up" or some variation of that - at any time...
put your hand on your heart and ask, "Georgianna? Are you ok?" Be sincere and gentle and
Don't just scream "NO. I. AM. NOT!" and run around the room smashing things...
get creative - it will feel like your lying at first but... so what?
You don't really want to smash up your stuff, you'll just have to clean it up.
I'm going to do all these things this week, so we'll be doing them together.

After a few days of this you will feel better. Don't call me.
You did the work. I just suggested - off the top of my head - a few things that you should not do.
 
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Georgianne12

Not Active
I came here the same way you guys did... all of you. I'm sure of this. Trust me.

I play a therapist on TV... so ignore everything I say.

1. Get an audible account;

2. During the day, listen to Pete Walker's Complex PTSD.
Pay attention.

3. As you attempt to fall asleep, listen to Marshall Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication.
Don't pay attention.

4. The New Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain (or get the book!)

Find the bit about drawing an upside-down picture or a crumpled piece of paper... one of them.
DO Follow these instructions (the author knows what she is talking about)
DON'T learn to draw or think about learning to draw, or anything like that - if you do, make sure you do it wrong.
These exercises are going to help you stop thinking (in a good way) not draw.
The exercises should be done for (make up some amount of time here) minutes
every time you start to feel your worst.

If you think something about not doing it right
or hear yourself saying, "Georgianne you're all f**ed up" or some variation of that - at any time...
put your hand on your heart and ask, "Georgianna? Are you ok?" Be sincere and gentle and
Don't just scream "NO. I. AM. NOT!" and run around the room smashing things...
get creative - it will feel like your lying at first but... so what?
You don't really want to smash up your stuff, you'll just have to clean it up.
I'm going to do all these things this week, so we'll be doing them together.

After a few days of this you will feel better. Don't call me.
You did the work. I just suggested - off the top of my head - a few things that you should not do.
Great! Thanks for the advice/help. I will try this asap and see what happens. Self talk is important, but the answer might be - no Im not alright Im pissed and scared, LOL. I hope you have good luck with this too.

hugs
G
 

Agita Kaput

Policy Enforcement
Sponsor
I hope you have good luck with this too.

hugs
G
Thanks. It has brought me luck.
I would never not suggest that you don't do anything that I myself don't avoid.
(Except the Drawing on The right side of the brain. I'm adding that it in cause we think too much.)

And yes... because I play a therapist on TV, I can make suggestions and give advice.

hugs back
AK
 

Agita Kaput

Policy Enforcement
Sponsor
Hi everyone. Thanks ahead of time for your help. I searched nightmares/prevention online and found you all. I was diagnosed with PTSD 25 yrs ago and lived a somewhat functional/ well life until recently. I have come full circle back to nightmare mode after a recent severe head injury at work that has resulted in horrible headaches 24/7.

Many of your stories are similar to mine. I am a teacher but have worked other jobs in the past. Our local insurance group cancelled on the teachers in our state during covid, so I am without insurance, but have workers comp for the head injury. It limits my help. So I am here to help myself and see how you are all coping/healing. Perhaps to vent a bit - maybe a lot.

I grew up in a home with many mental illnesses, abuses, etc. and learned to be a caretaker of others. I learned to duck and cover and not to bring my problems to anyone. My PTSD came on after a physical attack 25 years ago, but I feel like I was anti-social before this. I am divorced (8 yrs), super private, and mentally unhinged. I don't abuse anyone or lash out. I love to laugh and I am a good friend and listener.

My daughter is still with me and going to college while I provide a home for her. Recently, she is helping me around the house and I feel uncomfortable switching the roles and accepting her help with dishes, shopping, etc. I need to get my crap together, she is doing great in college and I don't want to sink her boat with my growing problems.

The neurologist is good, but not hearing me when I say I can't sleep, am having nightmares, and daymares. I leave the house in short stints, like an angry raccoon. My goal is to get things done and get back to my house / safe haven. On the outside I am a super patient caring person, inside I am mad as hell and everyone seems to be doing "it" wrong, it being life.

I am aware enough to realize that the sleep issue is driving my major inability to function. I need to get this fixed before I can tackle the other stuff. My TBI scares me. I am reluctant to explore sleep meds on my own, but I am desperate to find a working solution. Any suggestions are welcome. My nightmares are severe and are now visiting me when I am awake or just going to bed.

The nightmare that brought me here: A room full of huge overly furry cats, sitting everywhere, dark black and brown fur, maybe 50 of them squeezed into my bedroom. Nothing particularly horrifying except that I felt fur on my face, woke up and saw them. I was wide awake and couldnt move for a few minutes. Then got up finally and ran to the living room screaming to my daughter. We have no pets. Nobody was shot, stabbed, etc... in this dream, but I couldn't go back in my room. This happens every night, WTH?

I consider myself a bit of a tough lady. I have been lowered into an archeological cave to dig out a skeleton, dragged through a zoo cage by an angry chimp, and a myriad of other things that didn't give me nightmares. Why now? Schizophrenia? Reading all your posts.

Thanks for sharing your lives, questions, and answers,
G
How are you sleeping?
not being able move on waking? Had it twice. Terrifying, impossible to cry for help. I think I couldnt breath so it must have been much less then 2 minutes.
 

Georgianne12

Not Active
How are you sleeping?
not being able move on waking? Had it twice. Terrifying, impossible to cry for help. I think I couldnt breath so it must have been much less then 2 minutes.
Same, finally get a few hours and wake up still seeing things from nightmares. I believe reading some of the stories here has impacted my dreams quite a bit. There are folks here who have seen some really bad stuff. I am sure we all have, but I might need to be more careful what I look at. Thank you for the readings. I have read Walker in the past but looked it up again. Rosenberg is new to me. Ordered Drawing on the right side of the brain. Everything mellow helps.

How are you sleeping? I am guessing it is cooler up there in the mtns. Do you listen to Rosenberg before you go to sleep?

You guessed right, FL. Take care.

G
 

Agita Kaput

Policy Enforcement
Sponsor
Same, finally get a few hours and wake up still seeing things from nightmares. I believe reading some of the stories here has impacted my dreams quite a bit. There are folks here who have seen some really bad stuff. I am sure we all have, but I might need to be more careful what I look at. Thank you for the readings. I have read Walker in the past but looked it up again. Rosenberg is new to me. Ordered Drawing on the right side of the brain. Everything mellow helps.

How are you sleeping? I am guessing it is cooler up there in the mtns. Do you listen to Rosenberg before you go to sleep?

You guessed right, FL. Take care.

G
To answer properly, I'll post elsewhere. It's a lot detail about me. Not appropriate here.

I listen to Rosenberg everytime I want to feel loved or believe there are good people in the world. His voice is like...
 
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