General Newbie vent

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G-9

New Here
I’m still trying to figure out where I post thoughts so figure me if I’m in the wrong place
My husband got in a car accident today after work- he’s ok fender bender
But this does happen frequently alone with tickets. He of course was feeling like shit and god knows he’s distracted
But then he decides to have dinner with his mom. The woman who chose to stay with his abuser after she knew he had abused his brother. The woman who knows that our marriage is in a detrimental place and has done nothing to reach out. It makes me sick. And a pit in my stomach because it’s late and he’s still not home. The potential for him to not come home is definitely there tonight.
 

G-9

New Here
I’m sorry you’re having a stressful night @G-9.
Thank you. One of many and I’m sure many more to come
Just need to relate to someone
I put myself out there early today on this page. I researched a bunch. I organized his script renewal and picked it up & of course was mom and wife and everything that goes along with it
But the woman who stood by and let her sons be subject to this trauma is sitting across from him feeding him bullshit. I’m just angry and have to put it somewhere
 

KimmyO

Learning
Yes, it is frustrating to feel second place, esp to his Mom. He should choose you before his Mom, even in best of circumstances. You are his wife, his now life. His Mom is his past life, and should be secondary in life now. Of course, you can't change him or make him respect you or put you first but you can make sure he knows your heart and not be a door mat. There need to be consequences in life and tough love is needed so they see and decide you some times. It is up to you how you let people treat you. Esp. w the abusive past, he is choosing her because he clung to her in the past and she is his safety net, but he needs to grow out of that and look to you in his times of need. That is why it is good to move far enough away from parents to be dependent on each other. =)
 
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