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Nightmares And Random Flashbacks.. Please Help

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jessgirl23

New Here
Hello all,
I am suffering from PTSD (obviously). My event involves a person I was involved with for a few years and now I am in a new, very healthy relationship. I do not know how to get the nightmares to stop, and I need to do something about the random flashbacks. I am worried that if I don't heal, my current relationship will be affected. Does anyone have any good advice on how to get over these issues? My traumatic event was just about four months ago so it is still very fresh in my mind. I am sick of letting him control my mind. He's done enough to me. I feel as though he is still winning by me suffering for what he did to me. I am sooo exhausted of thinking about him. He doesn't desever it. Please help! I am young and don't really have any resources around me, so this forum is all I can turn. Thank you for reading this and God bless!
 
Jess,
Ptsd is hard and does include nightmares which you cannot prevent. You may get them lss fequently but they will be there ready to be triggered by something in your day even 30 yrs from now. Your BF can be a great ally if you can include him.

I think your best approach would be to tell your new bf about your trauma, all of it. Then he will have nothing to be hurt or jealous of. I know it is had to talk about but truth is necessary for any successful relationship. People usually sense when something is being hidden anyway. Please don't let the feelings of shame or guilt which belong to your abuser and NOT to you get in the way.

You are in my heart
 
HI Jess and welcome to the forum.....

Facing your trauma, writing about it, talking about it, how you felt then and now, is key to feeling better. I know it will be hard, and you will feel awful, but the more times that you do this(with breaks in between) the better you will feel in due time.

The process is long, and hard, and you won't see results overnight, but it will happen.... Self talk helps too. reminding yourself that you are safe, in the here and now, and not back in the trauma will help. Finding things to do will also help to keep you in the here and now. Keep something with you, a rock, a stuffed animal, a picture, anything that you can focus on when the flashbacks start. Just something to keep you HERE!!!!!!! Keeping with you something to smell is also a good tool to have. Touching things, will keep you in the here and now.

Be patient with yourself and reward yourself when you have made a small gain over things.......Be kind to yourself and take pleasures in the things that you enjoy!!!!!

Read everything you can, on this site, and through out the web. The more knowledge you have the better......
 
Jess,
I agree, don't hide this from your bf. Presented correctly, our symptoms can be understood by others and they can show compassion and support that can be very healing. You've nothing to be ashamed of. He can help you if he is a good man.

You need to get some treatment. This forum is very helpful, but it will be more helpful to releave your suffering if you have an experienced trauma therapist to be your ally.......someone you can develop trust with, since PTSD seems to take away our trust in life and the world around us. So developing trust with someone who knows how to treat this, I believe, is essential.

Check out your local counties mental health resources. Sliding scale options are usually availiable. In the meantime, crisis lines and confiding in trusted friends. When you are severely traumitized, we have a tendency to isolate ourselves from the world.........find people you can trust that you can talk to. You will quickly find out who are your true friends and who aren't. Be careful about who you choose..........present it slowly and patiently. This is a very distressing disorder.

My thoughts are with you and look forward to your sharing.
 
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