Not Sure If Ptsd Or Just My Anxiety

[Jontraums]

Hi everyone! I just want to ask something about what's bothering me recently.

I'm 20 yrs old, male.

For a background check, I actually have anxiety, but it's manageable. I tend to worry about my health (physical and mental) and my relationships. I usually worry that I might have X condition just because of X symptom, etc. It's kind of like being hypochondriac.

Now here is my question about PTSD. 12 years ago, when I was 8 years old, I had high fever which caused me to have really bad nightmares and hallucinations at night. The experience in itself was scary during the time that it occurred. I was in a really gloomy mood afterwards, especially since video games were taken away from me since we thought that it might have contributed to what happened. However, I was still able to function normally. I continued being an honor student, etc. It's just that it felt "different" with the gloomy mood. And are the traumatic events for criteria of PTSD only limited to what is typically described such as death, an accident, and the likes? Would my case qualify or not? I'm just not sure if what I was suffering was actually PTSD or just me overthinking it since I stumbled upon PTSD.

I eventually got over that, after a few months when it happened. Things got really better a year after too. I wasn't scared to talk about what happened. I eventually started playing video games when I was 10 years old too.

Fast forward to the present, I eventually discovered that I have anxiety, since I tend to worry excessively about things, usually my health or relationships. This would lead to feelings of fear, which I can manage fortunately. I was able to trace understand my condition better when I started seeing our college counselor. She helped me a lot, and I feel that I'm better equipped now to manage this condition.

Since I have anxiety, I usually worry irrationally about random things. My present worry is what happened to me 12 years ago. For some reason, during my most recent anxiety episode, the mood I had 12 years ago somehow went back. It's like I was there again, and I was worried that I might have to go through all that time again just to get better. However, when I was able to stop overthinking and manage my anxiety, that mood quickly went away as well. It's like I was feeling it because I was trying to remember it. I'm not sure which really. What happened 12 years ago doesn't really bother me anymore, it's just that THOUGHT of it coming back. The mood coming back. I also don't get nightmare and the like, I just hate it when the feeling is coming back, but it only happens when I am anxious, and when I somehow associate my mood to how I felt 12 years ago.

Now my worry is.. would that qualify under PTSD? Or is it just my anxiety/overthinking kicking in again?

 

[Kintsugi]

Short answer:

No. Having a scary hallucinatory fever cannot give you PTSD.

 

[Jontraums]

Thanks for the quick response! I appreciate it and would like to hear more from you and the others. Is it really that simple? So I'm just overthinking about this?

 

[Kintsugi]

I think given your self-professed hypochondriac-like paranoia, you probably DO have an issue that could (should?) get some professional attention. But PTSD? Yes, it really is that simple, you do not have qualifying trauma, at least not that you have shared. In order to have PTSD, you must meet Criterion A trauma:

Link Removed

ETA: this one is better
http://www.dsm5.org/Documents/PTSD Fact Sheet.pdf

 

[Jontraums]

I think given your self-professed hypochondriac-like paranoia, you probably DO have an issue that co...

Alright, thanks again for your response! I am indeed seeing our university counselor regarding my anxiety. One more thing, is it possible to have PTSD without being aware that something traumatic actually happened to you before?

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Ptsd is faaar more than a just anxiety.

 

[Justmehere]

I think what you are discovering is that what we think about affects how we feel. When you think that this bad event could happen again, you end up being in a bad mood.

I bet that if you kept a log, you would find that when you think about good things that could happen in the future, you will likely notice that you will have a better mood thinking about those things.

Learning CBT thought diffusion or thought stopping techniques might be really helpful for you in managing what you are dealing with.

Do you have PTSD? No one here can diagnose. That being said, nothing you describe sounds specific to PTSD. Not the event, nor your symptoms. Hallucinations from a fever can really scare a kid, but unless you thought you were in severe danger of immenent death, it's not likely criterion A trauma needed for a ptsd diagnosis.

Even more so, not everyone who goes through criterion A trauma develops PTSD.

None of your symptoms suggest a PTSD diagnosis. Being anxious about a past event happening again isn't suggestive of PTSD.

It does seem clear that you are really struggling and that stinks. If you find that your anxiety is interfering with your life and happiness (and it seems like it is), then it would be a really good idea to see a professional to figure out what is going on for you and learn some skills to manage and reduce these feelings and fears.

 

[Kintsugi]

@Justmehere gave an incredibly good response. I think it answers the last question you posed extremely well. As she said, we can't diagnose you, but it is my personal opinion given what you have shared that the chances you have PTSD are... Ludicrously small.

 

[joeylittle]

I am indeed seeing our university counselor regarding my anxiety.

One other bit of advice. Talk to your counselor about your symptoms, everything that is bothering you. Don't worry about figuring out where you 'fit', in terms of a mental health diagnosis. It is very, very easy to miss patterns and events when you don't think they answer the question - but they might absolutely answer the question. So, to the best of your ability - don't try and figure it out.

 

[Jontraums]

Thanks a lot everyone for your inputs! Everything is clearer to me now. I'm considering going to a different professional since I don't feel myself getting better..

One last question. About a year ago I had lung surgery. Prior to that, my lung condition was causing me a lot of anxiety too. The surgery went well, and I have no trouble going back and remembering what I experienced before. I'm not bothered by what happened at all now that all is well, but could that give me PTSD?

 

[joeylittle]

About a year ago I had lung surgery. Prior to that, my lung condition was causing me a lot of anxiety too. The surgery went well, and I have no trouble going back and remembering what I experienced before. I'm not bothered by what happened at all now that all is well, but could that give me PTSD?

We can't diagnose you - but from the way you wrote the above, I'm guessing, no.

Don't go fishing for the diagnosis. Talk to a professional, seriously. You need to be able to give someone your whole history, not just the bits that you think are relevant.

 

[Justmehere]

What did the university counselor say about your concern that you have PTSD? And if you haven't told them about these fears, why not?

The fears about your lung condition doesn't seem like PTSD, not the event, nor the symptoms you have now. Your symptoms don't suggest PTSD.

In the end, the interwebs are a great place for info, but not for determining if we have any specific mental or medical health diagnosis ourselves.

If you are dissatisfied with your therapist, tell them. Be specific about what isn't working and what you would like to get better in your life. Recovery from any mental health condition, any diagnosis, PTSD or otherwise, usually involves a lot of hard work and brutal honesty with our therapists and with ourselves. If you talk to your therapist about all of these things, and it still isn't working for you, then it makes sense to consider a second opinion. However, in your case, I have a feeling you will keep seeking a specific diagnosis again and again, and I think that and and of itself may be part of the work for you in therapy - to let go of the anxiety about having this or that condition. Try to stick it out with your therapist as much as you can or find a therapist who specializes in anxiety disorders. Your therapist now may know of a really good referal or two in your community.