Now that my childhood traumas have been uncovered, those I have always known and those I was not aware of, how do I move forward and live my life? I have been in intensive therapy for 7 months which has allowed me to access those hidden feelings that have been controlling my life.
Coming to grips with my traumatic youth and how absolutely damaging it has been to me my whole life leaves me in limbo. How do you move forward when you come to the realization that truths at the core of my being were never true? Is my life a fantasy with a dark reality at the core damage and scarring that has, unknown to me, controlled or at least influenced major decisions in my life. As a controlling personality the realization that I have never been in control is unsettling, to say the least.
As reality is uncovered it is making my world smaller and smaller until I am left standing on a cliff by myself in the middle of nowhere. My thoughts bounce around between confusion, sadness and emptiness. My only normal time is when I am so busy my mind escapes the darkness but always returns when I slow down. I feel no joy in my life and no dreams and goals for the future as I am stuck in the past, a child lost in the woods.
Coming to grips with my traumatic youth and how absolutely damaging it has been to me my whole life leaves me in limbo. How do you move forward when you come to the realization that truths at the core of my being were never true? Is my life a fantasy with a dark reality at the core damage and scarring that has, unknown to me, controlled or at least influenced major decisions in my life. As a controlling personality the realization that I have never been in control is unsettling, to say the least.
As reality is uncovered it is making my world smaller and smaller until I am left standing on a cliff by myself in the middle of nowhere. My thoughts bounce around between confusion, sadness and emptiness. My only normal time is when I am so busy my mind escapes the darkness but always returns when I slow down. I feel no joy in my life and no dreams and goals for the future as I am stuck in the past, a child lost in the woods.