My T and I have, lets say "amped" up treatment by adding an additional day a week and requests the both of us work harder. Now, with BPD and other diagnoses, the hard wired myths seem to stirring around. And of course any of my mean parts resist any change. It appears if I try and work on something my T and I talk about, then other things surface, like eating d/o and insomnia, etc. From what I try to recall, this pattern of behavior has taken place all my life and it's a horrible loop to get in but it's also a familiar "safe" feeling. My head constantly spins and never shuts down unless a lot of meds are taken. It's quite honestly: hell. I am basically fighting for my life right now and doing so alone. Because no one would understand and I don't blame them.