Ptsd and mdma

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kuteguy

New Here
Hi,

I was diagnosed a while ago with cPTSD and have been following for the last year that MDMA is having an amazing impact on curing/treating [c]PTSD (Dr Ben Sessa descibes it as the anti-biotic for the mind). I have sourced some of the "anti-biotic" but I would rather do it with an experienced sitter.

Is there anyone in the UK?

so far I have contacted all MAPS phase 2 trial locations (no: you have to live in the US/Canada/Israel), the trial in UK with Dr Ben Sessa (no: you have to be an alcoholic drinking 3 bottles of wine a day), many people in psychadelic meetups -> no outcome

Any other ideas? I would rather not self-therapy as I have not taken it before
 

Justmehere

Sponsor
I’ve been following these studies closely as well. Here are two good threads on this topic:
Mdma therapy for ptsd in 3rd phase
Mdma breakthrough treatment for ptsd

I would not recommend self medicating with street or prescription MDNA and expecting it to cure or help PTSD or cPTSD.

The way these studies are being done is to use it as a tool to bring down one’s defenses to make therapy more effective. It’s not used as a “cure.” It’s also not being used without treatment. One takes the medication under supervision, and then goes into day long treatment while medicated to integrate trauma.

Dr Ben Sessa’s studies are done in this way. He does not propose taking the drug without therapy or self medication with MDMA. Calling it an antibiotic was careless of him, because it’s not used at all like an antibiotic.

Self medicating is a good path a spike in symptoms by lowering the defenses without any therapeutic interventions.

I’d suggest waiting. I know that’s not the answer you want to hear. I was part of a study of a promising medical treatment of another kind for PTSD. All the evidence showed it could be so helpful. People praised it as the cure. It helped short term, remarkably so, but didn’t help over the long haul, and left me with a lingering health problem that leads me to deeply regret being part of the study even a decade later.

The whole purpose of studies is to work out what is the most safe and effective treatment, and to discover risks.

I want a cure for PTSD too, and if MDNA ends up to be proven to be effective and worth the risks, I’d sign up for it. But for now, as desperate as I am, I’m waiting, and working my butt off in therapy.
 

shimmerz

MyPTSD Pro
I have sourced some of the "anti-biotic" but I would rather do it with an experienced sitter.
Have you tested the MDMA for purity? If you have been following this modality then you will know that the MDMA needs to be absolutely pure in order to be effective. Please assure me you have checked this. Otherwise your antibiotic may well turn into a mass of bacteria. Nobody wants that for you.

I have some posts out there on MDMA and my experience with it. Also my diary has some stuff in it. My diary is long but if you want to search specifically look for my user name and the search term 'session'.
 

kuteguy

New Here
I have sent a sample to wedinos and waiting to hear from them - so yes absolutely will not take without testing it. I have a testing kit too so that will be used back up as twice my sample to wedinos has been rejected (not sure what I am getting wrong on their form)

Justmehere - thanks, I hear you and that is the sensible approach for sure. I have been working with a therapist for a year now and making small inroads no doubt. But there is something there that is being protected more than fort knox, deep inside me and I want to get through to that part of me. In the end I want to be operating from my True Self, not from some self living in fear.
 

shimmerz

MyPTSD Pro
Would your therapist be adverse to you coming to your appts with MDMA in your system? Not sure at all how practical that would be or whether the therapist would agree, but if you have Fort Knox going on, you need to be careful.

Also, when I took MDMA over a period of time, I had a friend come over and babysit me. Mostly I wrote what I needed to process but at times chatted with him. Also, not sure if you have somatic events that go on, but I have to tell you, I needed someone to watch me because I would have some pretty crazy somatic stuff that went on with me as my trauma was mainly preverbal stuff.
 

Justmehere

Sponsor
But there is something there that is being protected more than fort knox, deep inside me and I want to get through to that part of me. In the end I want to be operating from my True Self, not from some self living in fear.
I’ve had a wall I’ve been battling for years. I get a little of how frustrating it can be. I too want to be fully me, and integrate all the crap... which is why I think MDMA is so promising, especially for somatic and pre-verbal trauma held in the body.

At the same time, there is a balance to pulling down the walls. My therapist (who also is in support of the studies) reminded me a year ago that it is dangerous to tear down a fence when you don’t know why it’s up. That’s why it’s important to have support and therapy to get through walls coming down.

This wall I’ve been battling has come down on its own. When I have been ready and able to handle what’s on the other side. It’s been awful. I’m glad we are dealing with it, but I’m also glad it didn’t happen sooner.
 

kuteguy

New Here
Thank you.. That is very encouraging for me! As my therapist also says what you have said

She believes we have everything to heal, within us and when we are ready

Suddenly switching my mindset from desperately and unsuccessfully searching for the mdma therapy route vs the natural route is also empowering me as making me happy.

I have realised that when I waste a whole day or more on searching for mdma therapy, iboga, etc, I actually feel crap about myself and my situation. Hapless. As I am admitting I can't fix myself and at the same time not having the reward of finding a sitter for the mdma route.

Thanks again
 
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