Mee
MyPTSD Pro
i am diagnosed with PTSD and I feel this us accurate. My therapist oz not label oriented but a lot of my therapy focuses not on my trigger incident but on childhood and the nurture that made me ’me’. Sometimes I feel she is steering me towards being in a place that were she label focused would be cptsd. I fon’t feel that's accurate. I did suffer CSA and some other situations, ( some dramas ) but I do not feel that I had PTSD before my trigger incident/ breakdown whatever. I think that incident was the traumatic event and that I had survived the previous traumas of childhood with out PTSD.
Is It more likely I am being stubborn and resistant?
To be clear I fully accept that my previous life experience made me who I am and my morals and probably made me the type of person who could get PTSD, but I do not think I feel recurring trauma over those events. I had processes them adequately in early adulthood and accepted them as part of my history but not defining.
Does the definition even matter? I think I want to ’blame’ my perp for my ptsd ( not fair I accept) in order to feel anger? The emotion I struggle to maintain and process.
Possibly relevant is that I did gave anger and processed it for the childhood stuff. I think that helped. I over worked out anger through a false idea it was a bad emotion to have. So thats why my therapist and I work really hard to connect me with anger.
Is It more likely I am being stubborn and resistant?
To be clear I fully accept that my previous life experience made me who I am and my morals and probably made me the type of person who could get PTSD, but I do not think I feel recurring trauma over those events. I had processes them adequately in early adulthood and accepted them as part of my history but not defining.
Does the definition even matter? I think I want to ’blame’ my perp for my ptsd ( not fair I accept) in order to feel anger? The emotion I struggle to maintain and process.
Possibly relevant is that I did gave anger and processed it for the childhood stuff. I think that helped. I over worked out anger through a false idea it was a bad emotion to have. So thats why my therapist and I work really hard to connect me with anger.