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Undiagnosed Ptsd For Being Fired From A Job???

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17yearsuffer

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Can someone have PTSD from being fired from a job? I was fired 17 years ago from the job I always dreamed of getting and have never gotten over it. Sadly it has affected me in every aspect of my life from getting new jobs, working at the jobs I've had since, relationships with my family and husband, social interactions, feelings of self worth, etc. I have anxiety all the time I will be fired again from another place, I have anxiety about getting new jobs (husband was military so I have had to get a lot of new jobs), I can't deal with work conflict because of the fear of being fired, so I don't stick up for myself or I go to the extreme in sticking up for myself and risk getting fired so I quit to avoid being fired, no happy medium. I have anxiety, can't sleep, cry all the time over the stupidest stuff and can't even be friends with people from my old job where I was fired because I really think of bad thoughts of how I wish the employer would suffer, I feel jealous of my past co-workers and don't wish them ill will, but hate that they are still there working for a place that treated me so badly, I feel so hateful. I think about what it would be like to die, but don't want to kill myself or anything like that, but I think about what it would be like to be dead and its makes me sick. I have guilt about everything I do and honestly, I feel guilty even asking this because there are military members who have experienced war, death and they have PTSD and I am thinking I have it from being fired at a job and when I read this over I sound pathetic...but....I really feel like there is no other description for what I feel. Any time I have to disclose to new employers about being fired I just want to crawl in a hole and die from embarrassment. I have talked to a few doctors and they don't think I am depressed, they have never mentioned PTSD but just think I am too sensitive.
 
Can someone have PTSD from being fired from a job?

Was there life threatening violence, or sexual assault involved in the firing?

If not, then no.

Have you experienced life threatening violence or sexual assault?

If so, then maybe*.

Maybe, because not everyone who experiences Criterion A trauma goes on to develop PTSD (in fact, most don't), but if you have trauma in your history, that any kind of stress, stressor, or loss of a coping mechanism can trigger pre-existing PTSD. Doesn't mean it is PTSD, CritA trauma can lead to or exacerbate a whole lot of different disorders. So just having a trauma history doesn't mean one has PTSD, it just makes it possible / throws that hat in the ring along with many many other possibilities.
 
Thanks for the advice but I just wouldn't even know what to say, I can't even think about calling a place and saying I need to see someone because I think I have PTSD from 17 years ago being fired and am just now trying to deal with it. I also can't even think about facing someone to tell them why, it took a lot for me to come on here. Honestly, I think its apparent I will never get professional help because I just can't bring myself to even say what my problem is, I think I am even confused on the problem, its been 17 years, I should be like "who cares" but I think if the professional even looked the least bit weird at me for wanting to see them about this, I would definitely lose my mind and fly off the handle. I feel stupid as it is and weak mentally.
 
@ Combustible Lemon...no on life threatening or sexual assault, but I definitely feel I was fired because of being a woman who was young and pretty. I was told I should model instead of doing the work I was doing (was police officer), which was pretty insulting. But I was constantly watched and critiqued about everything. I saw death in police work and had violence from calls, foot pursuits, fights, fatal accidents with children, but honestly, those don't seem to bother me. I didn't have the best sexual experiences when younger, but thats a whole other conversation.
 
I saw death in police work and had violence from calls, foot pursuits, fights, fatal accidents with children, but honestly, those don't seem to bother me.

That's a whole other conversation & issue than the manner in which you were fired, honestly.

You may have the most issue with the least problematic aspect of that work, just because it's easier on your mind, but the firing itself is probably not your most pressing problem to address, it's just brought on all the other things to the surface.
 
But I was constantly watched and critiqued about everything. I saw death in police work and had violence from calls, foot pursuits, fights, fatal accidents with children, but honestly, those don't seem to bother me.

It is possible that you developed PTSD from these traumas on the job, and not being fired. That may just be avoidance talking, your brain just not wanting to confront the traumas and finding other things to dwell on. That's fairly common. And it's normal to not be "bothered" by certain traumas if you haven't really faced them yet. That's just emotional numbing.

In my opinion, what you describe sounds like anxiety and possibly depression, but I'm not a doctor. So I obviously can't diagnose you. If you are seeking a diagnosis, it's probably better NOT to tell the doctor you think you have PTSD, and let them make the diagnosis. Tell them about any traumas, but don't lead with, "I think I have PTSD." For one, just so you don't get falsely diagnosed, and two, because I think it might make them more reluctant to offer a diagnosis if you keep insisting it's PTSD.
 
. I saw death in police work and had violence from calls, foot pursuits, fights, fatal accidents with children, but honestly, those don't seem to bother me.

I sometimes half-joke I don't have PTSD, I have NLSD (normal life stress disorder). As from day 1 it wasn't my job (USMC), it wasn't combat, it wasn't all the big bad everything else... Those things I was fine with. That's where things made sense, where life made sense, & where I made sense. It was coming back to THIS world, where nothing made sense anymore. And both times things have gotten hard for me PTSD-wise there has been this overwhelming, life consuming, go-back-go-back-go-back. Coupled with bone deep shame, regret, remorse, hating myself for not being back, not being useful. When I left the USMC, I lost what made me, me. What made life make sense. And then my life exploded. Without the structure & order of my job? Without having a purpose? Without people I trusted having my back? SMH. Things got dark, fast.

The first time around, I did go back, in a somewhat different capacity. Which both helped and made things infinitely worse. Got to the point unless I was in the field, I was absolutely non-functional. Homeless on a beach, with tens of thousands -or more- in the bank nonfunctional, because I couldn't make paperwork make sense. Couldn't fill out a lease. Fishing to eat, because while I could haggle like a native in suks & bazars & pharmacias? I couldn't buy bread at a grocery store. I could make friends everywhere I went if 8-80 they were carrying rusted out soviet era to <drool, I want one, OMFG> weaponry & half the time were either high as blazes and crazy as f*ck... but the nice suburban PTA lady across the street with her capris & ponytail? :eek: Full on adrenaline response. No. Hide me. I'm not here. Go. Away. :bag: :facepalm: :banghead:

Sometimes it's not what people think should f*ck you up, that does.

Just to be clear, not trying to Dx you. As I said above, people have a very wide series of responses to trauma, and you may very well not have PTSD. But my own experience is that it was when trauma made sense, but normal-life didn't, that I was diagnosed. TBH, I thought they were full of it. My life makes sense, there. It doesn't make sense here. Send me back there.

Regardless of whether you have PTSD or not? You've got a problem, and that deserves actioning, deserves solutions.
 
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