17yearsuffer
New Here
Can someone have PTSD from being fired from a job? I was fired 17 years ago from the job I always dreamed of getting and have never gotten over it. Sadly it has affected me in every aspect of my life from getting new jobs, working at the jobs I've had since, relationships with my family and husband, social interactions, feelings of self worth, etc. I have anxiety all the time I will be fired again from another place, I have anxiety about getting new jobs (husband was military so I have had to get a lot of new jobs), I can't deal with work conflict because of the fear of being fired, so I don't stick up for myself or I go to the extreme in sticking up for myself and risk getting fired so I quit to avoid being fired, no happy medium. I have anxiety, can't sleep, cry all the time over the stupidest stuff and can't even be friends with people from my old job where I was fired because I really think of bad thoughts of how I wish the employer would suffer, I feel jealous of my past co-workers and don't wish them ill will, but hate that they are still there working for a place that treated me so badly, I feel so hateful. I think about what it would be like to die, but don't want to kill myself or anything like that, but I think about what it would be like to be dead and its makes me sick. I have guilt about everything I do and honestly, I feel guilty even asking this because there are military members who have experienced war, death and they have PTSD and I am thinking I have it from being fired at a job and when I read this over I sound pathetic...but....I really feel like there is no other description for what I feel. Any time I have to disclose to new employers about being fired I just want to crawl in a hole and die from embarrassment. I have talked to a few doctors and they don't think I am depressed, they have never mentioned PTSD but just think I am too sensitive.