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Ptsd got your appetite? Hang in there!

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HannaD

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A warning sign I have is numbness. Sometimes, I can't tell when I'm hungry and if I'm not careful I'll forget to eat. If that goes on too long then I'll develop anorexia and have trouble eating despite really wanting to. Have you ever been hungry and wanted to eat but, had trouble chewing and swallowing the food? It's almost like nausea but you're not getting sick.

Last week I looked up PTSD and lack of appetite. I learned that without carbohydrates, sugars, fats, and protein our brains will restrict higher function. And that spells out disaster for PTSD sufferers. I had anorexia at the time so made a real effort to nibble on some crackers and cheese. Fortunately, my appetite did come back after awhile.

Armed with this new insight I resolved myself to get up and start fixing breakfast. Nothing complicated that would discourage me. Just some eggs and toast. It was still really difficult to eat despite being really good. But, I managed and hopefully my appetite will continue to improve.
 
This is really revealing and helpful read for me as I will get very obsessive about food intake, restriction and go through aversion based on smell. Like everything food related will smell unappealing and I end up restricting and not eating very much, then of course the whole digestion system gets out of whack and I don’t feel well.
 
I’m an irregular eater. Periods of feast and famine:( but the overeating is more related to stress. Both are related to that ‘numbness’.
And yes, I notice ‘fussiness’ related to stress too, and I have self hatred about this as there was a lot of shame linked to fussiness and food and the emotions of others and hospitality etc in my upbringing. Its very difficult to gauge in this new world of respecting my own wants. Generally part of my therapeutic plan is to try and regulate eating. I feel a bit ashamed now as I have been thinking about .... an intentional for the good bypassing of that.
 
Reading this made me decide to take a break at work and eat my banana and some popcorn. I pack snacks every day, but forget to eat. I don’t really have time for lunch until late afternoon. I have been badly gaining weight lately due to not eating while a little hungry, and resorting to sugar and giant meals at the end of the day. I tend to stress eat when my T is out of town or not eat at all.
 
When my guy is depressed or anxious he doesn't eat much either. What I have noticed is, there IS one food he will eat when he's symptomatic. A bacon cheeseburger from Burger King. ?

It's kinda wrapped into his trauma. He craved them when he was deployed so that was always the first thing he ate when he was home on leave. It is his go to comfort food. I don't think he even realizes it but I have and I can usually get him to eat one and sometimes two. (I'm tricky like that ?)

I keep some of his favorite sweets on hand too. Brownies, grapes, almonds, cookies... At least when he's missing meals he's still getting a few essentials. Not the greatest but he's in good shape so I don't worry too much about it. When he's eating three squares? I know he's doing really well.

Do you have any favorite foods/snacks?
Ever try smoothies?
Do you like to cook?

Just throwing some ideas out there. I hope you come up with a solution! And don't beat yourself up for it. You're here reaching out for ideas. Well done.
 
@LuckiLee you raise an interesting point, about cravings and go to foods. I really don’t like junk food and am really conscious about food sourcing. When very bad I crave fast food fried chicken, or preferably chicken nuggets. This is so opposite to something I would normally choose. This is normally self limiting as I cannot go out for it and don’t have the makings at home usually. And home fried chicken isn’t what I want anyway. :/. I think it’s something about low flavour challenge/ high protein / fat? So emergency food for the body, but little emotional investment in enjoying taste?
 
Do you have any favorite foods/snacks?
Ever try smoothies?
Do you like to cook?
I love to cook actually. Reading how much our spouses love us despite our ptsd symptoms is so heartwarming. It reminds me of times when I just couldn't cook (mainly my task). My dear husband would go of his way to get my favorites. Oddly enough if eating is too difficult, sipping on chicken broth from a soup can be really soothing.

I feel a bit ashamed now as I have been thinking about .... an intentional for the good bypassing of that.
My excuse was to not want to eat out because, I felt ashamed that I couldn't get myself together enough to make proper meals. A practice I like to do is to give that shame a voice in my head and try to talk to it and reason with it. This was originally learned from my therapist when she taught me to take care of the little girl part of me that learned to live in fear. Be kind and understanding to that part of yourself but also firm and try to have the final decision. It takes practice though.
 
Thank you for posting this, it makes me feel less alone!! I honestly can never tell when I’m hungry. I just get really angry if I haven’t eaten for more than 6 hours, I eat w bit then I feel better. I haven’t felt hunger in a few months tbh. I’ve gained a lot of weight bc I don’t relate food fo emotional regulation, not nutrition.
 
When I'm not feeling hunger at all and I'm very symptomatic ill have a protein drink with protein powder, almond milk, a banana etc for breakfast and lunch. Actually now that I think of it that's also my daily breakfast. At least I'm getting calories in liquid form if I feel I can't eat.
 
I think @LuckiLee is really spot on.

For me I'd say high calorie/ low volume, protein or something soothing/ cool (milkshake wold be a treat, yogurt; Cream of wheat and Gaviscon when all else fails).

I find it can be related to feeling unwell, stress, common self-defeating beliefs (you have to feel worth food, to eat it), the sensory things others have mentioned (too strong a smell, etc), forgetting about why I shouldn't eat/ feeling relief, having it there. I don't really care about 3 meals./ day as I always had a hard time eating b/fast, and I've gone 1 meal/ day most days for about 35-40 years. It won't kill you that quickly if I'm any indication. :rolleyes::laugh: Eating (for myself) was never a big priority. But I love bacon on toast on Christmas morning, a turkey sandwich anytime, coffee, and whatever I have available is better than not having anything. And small amounts of sweet stuff constantly helps I think, esp if the physical demands are high.

It's a combination between bad gut, allergies and intolerances (but not to the foods people are commonly allergic to), sensitivities to the smell, etc, and state of my mind/ fear/ grief/ too wound up/ not a big priority for myself.

Good luck to you. :hug:
 
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