Punished For Being Nice

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Powder

MyPTSD Pro
Is this just how it feels being PTSD?

Am I way off?

I pushed myself to go outside my comfort zone with my spouse in loving ways. He never said anything positive until after he blew up at me while I was waiting on him hand and foot by way of acknowledging the bad timing. It's like "I scratch your back, you blow up at me."

Then, I got my children a new pet, and then we read online to not begin training it for a week, and she blew up at me over the inpatient feeling. I get that. She's 7 1/2 in 2nd grade, but after 45 minutes of ranting, kicking out (literally) and getting more and more angry at me, and my hoping my husband got home because nothing I say is calming her down, my ears are ringing, I'm having chest pain...not feeling too good.

I went to the ER after several days of ice with my spouse over his random blow up. We still don't know what's going on there.

I'm actively trying to take things easy and I thought the positives of the new pet would be nice. It was until this delay for my kid, who doesn't understand. Now she's begging for other $ and I don't have it due to the pet purchase. I don't want to donate daily to her school fund raiser so she can win plastic toys she's lose interest in within 24 hours. I hate that the school does this to parents struggling financially.

I get guilt trips daily from my kid who's "the only one" who can't have or do X. Having to wait more days to train her hamster, meltdown!

How do you handle it when you're a hard-working, barely holding your health together, PTSD mom/wife or family member of any kind, and your family is constantly raking you over coals for just trying to do nice things for them?!

Obviously, with my shaky health what it is, I need a calmer home to come home to. This is just not working well lately. People need to stop treating me like their food, chores, $, sex, (insert any form of gratification) dispenser with NO FEELINGS!

I'm ready to move out and live alone deep in a forest in a camo hut.
 

Hope2004

New Here
Is this just how it feels being PTSD?

Am I way off?

I pushed myself to go outside my comfort zone with m...
Hey, I understand about wanting to move far away alone because you're not being appreciated or respected. I feel this way a lot! But then I realize I can't go two hours without my family. I know in the end you don't get points for giving up and running away. You get points for hanging in there and finding creative ways to make it work. So I pray and ask God for the wisdom to make it work.
 
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