Question, should I see of my brother will do a telehealth with my T?


I realize that when I am talking with my T about my younger years, 10-17 when most of my traumas happened there are many parts I either can't remember clearly or have a hard time remembering details of some events. My brother who is 4 years older propably can help put some of my random thoughts in chronological order.

My brother does not know about my CSA nor am I ready to tell him but I think an hour with my T would help alot. Is this a strange request?


No, not a strange request at all. My brother who also had PTSD, came to live with me, and we ended up triggering each other like crazy. This sounds like a good way of finding out things but on the other hand, you might not be ready to remember some things. I was reminded of my traumas by my mother, and then I had a huge cascade of memories causing a breakdown and suicidality. Maybe deal with them when they come up?


What's making you want you to have those conversations with your brother in therapy as opposed to with your brother?

I battle a lot about what to tell my sisters. They don't know anything about my CSA/CSE. They don't know I am in therapy.
What sort of conversations do you and your brother have?

Sounds a good thing to all mull over with your T?


One thing I noticed when I went to therapy the first time was I thought why is not everybody in therapy to heal or grow? I thought this was the most kept secret for becoming a good version of the self.

I wonder what you would think if you put yourself in your brother's shoes and what he may think or feel about this? Is he in therapy? Would going to therapy and helping you out, destabilize him in some ways or make him question his own version of things? if you are not super close, do you think this is fair to him? If you are realizing your childhood was not what you thought, what do you think or may think about his life in this environment? Is he well and integrated in his life or also suffering in some ways?

There is a good reason why we have dyad in therapy. It is for the individual to make sense of their story and find their own meaning; it is not about autobiographical stuff where your brother may fill in for you but the emotions you had those times which I think only YOU will know. IMHO, as you recover, most likely others' stories becomes more noise cause your body remembers and releases the tension -even the therapist's impact/empathy stops at the beginning of the bodily feelings.

I wonder if you should explore further why you need your brother in your session with your therapist and by that itself frees you the need for your brother's validation in some ways?