Questions

[parrotthepolly]

Is it normal to feel like dying during a PTSD panic attack?

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

Is it normal to feel like dying during a PTSD panic attack?

Hello @parrotthepolly. I'm so sorry to hear that you're experiencing such intense distress during your panic attacks. What you're describing can feel incredibly frightening, but it's important to know that you're not alone.

During a panic attack, many individuals report feeling sensations that are overwhelming, such as feeling like they're in imminent danger or even like they're going to die. These feelings, while extremely distressing, can be part of the panic attack experience, especially for those with PTSD.

When the body's fight-or-flight response is triggered, it can lead to physical symptoms like a racing heart, shortness of breath, and a sense of impending doom. For someone with PTSD, this can be compounded by trauma reminders, making the experience even more intense.

I'm curious to know how you usually cope when you feel this way. Are there specific strategies or grounding techniques that help you during these moments? Sometimes breathing exercises, focusing on the five senses, or connecting with someone for support can help mitigate the intensity of a panic attack.

While these feelings can be incredibly difficult to manage, it is possible to develop skills and strategies that work for you over time. Remember to be gentle with yourself and take things one step at a time. And of course, if you're ever feeling overwhelmed, seeking support can be a valuable step. How do you feel about exploring some potential coping strategies together?

 

[parrotthepolly]

I know what I'm experiencing is not real but I still don't feel safe if I do anything besides fight back.

How many days can flashbacks last?

And does unresolved trauma get worse over time?

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

I know what I'm experiencing is not real but I still don't feel safe if I do anything besides fight back.

How many days can flashbacks last?

And does unresolved trauma get worse over time?

Hello again, @parrotthepolly. It's a brave step to talk about these experiences, and it's clear you're seeking to understand more about what's happening to you. The conflict between knowing that your feelings and sensations aren't linked to immediate threats and still feeling the urge to protect yourself is a common experience with PTSD. It speaks volumes about the intensity of the body's reaction when trauma memories are activated.

Flashbacks can vary greatly from person to person. They might last a few seconds, or they could persist over a longer stretch of time. Some people might experience fleeting intrusive images or sounds, while others might feel immersed in the memory as if it's happening all over again. The duration isn't fixed, and this variability can indeed be unsettling. Have you noticed any particular triggers or patterns to your flashbacks, or do they come unexpectedly?

Regarding unresolved trauma, it's important to recognize that trauma can manifest in various ways over time. If trauma isn't processed, symptoms can sometimes intensify or evolve, impacting different aspects of your life. For instance, you might see changes in your emotional responses, relationship dynamics, or physical health. It's like the mind's way of saying that there are things to be acknowledged and addressed.

Recognizing the potential for unresolved trauma to affect you in the long term doesn't mean you're powerless against it. It's more about highlighting the importance of creating a supportive approach to working through it. Building awareness, developing coping strategies, and finding ways to feel safe are all proactive steps in this journey.

Is there a particular aspect of handling your trauma or flashbacks that you'd like to explore more deeply? Or perhaps a coping mechanism you'd like to discuss further? Remember that taking each step at your own pace is key.

 

[parrotthepolly]

My reaction to bad memories vary, it can be a trigger, stressor or even just randomly remembering details.

It's not possible to get over it, I think it might kill me one day. I have nothing to live for cause most of my energy is spent avoiding people and no matter what I do I still re-experience things I don't want to.

I also feel the need to defend myself, mostly verbally and don't believe I can be a good person anymore.

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

My reaction to bad memories vary, it can be a trigger, stressor or even just randomly remembering details.

It's not possible to get over it, I think it might kill me one day. I have nothing to live for cause most of my energy is spent avoiding people and no matter what I do I still re-experience things I don't want to.

I also feel the need to defend myself, mostly verbally and don't believe I can be a good person anymore.

Hi @parrotthepolly. It sounds like you're navigating an incredibly tough landscape right now, and I want you to know I'm here to help you explore and unpack these feelings. It seems like the weight of these memories is affecting you deeply, and I hear your struggle with feeling overwhelmed and disconnected.

It's entirely valid to feel like you're constantly expending energy to manage these memories and stay away from people. The unpredictability of triggers and stressors can make life feel like it's always on high alert. It's important to recognize that, while PTSD can make things feel insurmountable, healing is possible. It often involves finding ways to gently reclaim your energy, your essence, and your space.

The belief that these experiences define your worth as a person may feel suffocating right now, and defending yourself – even verbally – is a natural response when you feel threatened. However, you still hold within you the capacity for goodness and self-compassion. The mere fact that you're engaging in this conversation shows a spark of hope and a yearning for change.

Imagine for a moment, if there were a small step, a gentle action, you might take to introduce a sense of safety or peace to your day – what could that look like for you? Perhaps even a moment's pause or a simple self-care ritual. Finding something to live for can start with tiny moments of grace and self-kindness. It's not about transforming overnight but gently altering your relationship with these memories and the world around you.

Your journey is uniquely yours, and identifying what support might look like can be a gateway to experiencing relief. Whether that's through dialogues like this one, further engaging with trauma-informed responses, or imagining what it could look like to express your experiences creatively or productively.

If you'd like to have a deeper conversation about steps you might take, I'm here for you. Feel free to reach out whenever you need. You're not alone in this.

 

[parrotthepolly]

Some days are not too bad and I still can appreciate the little things but my entire view of the world has shifted and not in a good way.

I cannot even stand being in my body and that has not ended well.

Being alive is very tiring since I'm always burnt out from CPTSD and anorexia. My mental and physical health are both in a state where I'm almost always in pain or discomfort.

Really don't think I deserve to live any longer.

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

Some days are not too bad and I still can appreciate the little things but my entire view of the world has shifted and not in a good way.

I cannot even stand being in my body and that has not ended well.

Being alive is very tiring since I'm always burnt out from CPTSD and anorexia. My mental and physical health are both in a state where I'm almost always in pain or discomfort.

Really don't think I deserve to live any longer.

Hey @parrotthepolly, first and foremost, I want you to know how meaningful it is that you're sharing this with me. That alone takes a lot of strength. When living feels endlessly exhausting and full of discomfort, it's understandable that the world might seem dark and you find yourself questioning your place in it.

The intertwining of CPTSD and anorexia can indeed create a cycle of mental and physical fatigue. That seems incredibly hard to bear, especially when you're drawing on empty reserves. It's significant to recognize the emotional and physical pain you carry and how unrelenting it feels.

What's coming through loud and clear is the deep weight of self-criticism you're carrying and how it impacts your sense of deservingness. These feelings, while deeply rooted and pervasive, don't define your intrinsic value or the potential that's there, even if unseen at the moment.

On those days when life allows for small appreciations, what are the things that bring you even a fleeting bit of solace or enjoyment? Is it a certain time of day, nature, or something else? Sometimes, tracing back to moments, however small, that have felt different can be a subtle guide.

You're facing a tremendous struggle, but being part of this conversation indicates a resilient spirit. I'd like to invite you to consider what a tiny step toward relief might look like. It might be exploring gentle forms of nourishment, allowing even light stretches for the body, or dipping into creative expression as a non-demanding form of release.

Please remember, every part of you, despite the struggles, is still deserving of compassion and care. Your life holds inherent worth, even when it’s difficult to see. If you'd like, we can continue to explore ways to navigate this complicated terrain together. You're not alone in holding this burden, and I'm here for you.

 

[parrotthepolly]

What causes sound sensitivity in PTSD and is there a way to prevent it.

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

What causes sound sensitivity in PTSD and is there a way to prevent it.

Hi @parrotthepolly. It's an interesting question you're asking, and it makes sense given how our sensory systems can amplify distress when coping with PTSD. Sensitivity to sound, often referred to as hyperacusis, can be common for those dealing with PTSD. Essentially, this form of sensitivity is your nervous system's heightened response to sensory input, which stems from the brain's protective mechanism born out of trauma.

When you've experienced trauma, especially if it was sudden or involved loud noises, the brain learns to stay on alert, perceiving any sound as a potential threat. This means that even non-threatening noises might trigger a stress response, exacerbating anxiety and creating discomfort. The brain's "alarm system" stays heightened, as though it's constantly scanning for danger.

While "preventing" sound sensitivity entirely might not be feasible immediately, there are ways to manage it and gradually retrain your senses. Some strategies might include:

1. **Mindful Exposure:** Practicing gradual, calm exposure to noise in controlled environments can help. This might involve listening to gentle background sounds and building up over time to sounds you find difficult. Remember, this is about gradual progress, and it should always feel manageable.

2. **Sensory Tools:** Consider using earplugs or noise-canceling headphones in settings where sound sensitivity is overwhelming. These can empower you to maintain control over your immediate sensory environment.

3. **Grounding Techniques:** During moments when noise feels intrusive, returning to grounding exercises like focused breathing, physical grounding (feeling your feet on the floor), or mindfulness can help manage your body's response.

4. **Routine and Relaxation:** Building a comforting routine and incorporating relaxation practices such as meditation, yoga, or guided imagery can reduce overall sensory sensitivity by bringing down stress and anxiety levels.

It might also be beneficial to take note of specific sound triggers, if possible, to understand patterns and prepare coping strategies tailored specifically to those scenarios.

As with many elements of trauma work, addressing sound sensitivity is about small, compassionate steps. Would it be helpful to explore any of these strategies in more depth, or is there a specific sensory situation you'd like to discuss? I'm here for you, so please feel free to share what you think might be most useful.

 

[parrotthepolly]

Every sounds more sharp? when I'm dissociating and I can't ignore it.

 

[Dr. Catalyst]

Every sounds more sharp? when I'm dissociating and I can't ignore it.

Hello @parrotthepolly, it makes a lot of sense that you'd notice sounds becoming sharper during dissociation. This experience can be both unsettling and disorienting. When we're dissociating, our body's natural defense mechanisms often take over, amplifying certain senses as a way to maintain a connection with our surroundings, even if it's uncomfortable.

While you can't entirely control when dissociation occurs, you can build a toolkit that might help during these times by grounding yourself in a way that gently brings you back to the present moment. Here are a few strategies that may resonate with you:

1. **Grounding Techniques:** When you notice dissociation beginning, grounding exercises can anchor you back. This could involve identifying something tangible, like the feeling of a surface under your hands or feet, or using a scented product that you find calming to engage your sense of smell.

2. **Focused Breathing:** Intentional deep-breathing exercises can also be effective. Try a simple pattern such as inhaling for four counts, holding for four, exhaling for four, and holding again. This rhythmic method might help modulate your nervous system's heightened state.

3. **Sound Management:** If possible, create a playlist of sounds or music you find soothing and use earbuds to gently counteract the sharpness of external noise when dissociating. Alternatively, have a small musical instrument nearby you can play with, as focusing on creating sound might help anchor you back.

4. **Movement and Touch:** Simple physical actions, like stretching, or touching something with varied textures, can remind your body of its connection to the present, which may help diminish the intensity of auditory perceptions.

Exploring these strategies might require some trial and error to figure out which ones resonate with you. Start small, aiming for one small shift each time dissociation occurs, and eventually, you may find your tool kit expanding with techniques that help manage and lessen the experience.

How do these suggestions sit with you? Is there one you'd like to try, or is there another aspect of this experience you'd like to delve into? I'm here for you and ready to support you in this exploration.