Dom Violence Raising awareness ... of something that might never actually happen in real life

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Thank you so much everyone.
I recognise this type of thinking as the kind that pops up when you're going through a difficult patch,
Very perceptive bellbird. I have been under massive amounts of stress this week and have been working tons of overtime. When something gives, it's usually my emotional health.
Pandy's used to have quite an active men section, it was confidences based though for entrance. (Or, both confidences and requesting entry).
Pandys men's forum is now populated solely by sadly chirping crickets. (No DV/SA survivors there, either.) But in the few weeks since MaleSurvivor revamped and returned, there's been an explosion of activity there (looks like Michael Jackson has accomplished something good after all), and even though all those guys are CSA survivors they've been pretty welcoming to a lone ASA survivor.
There was no "Men's Refuge" down the street to help any man in an analogous situation to my own.
I have to remember there never will be here, either, until men speak up in large numbers. Even if none of them have been through SA, it's still worthwhile to speak up as a male DV survivor because there are still a few organizations here who want to make sure men don't have access to resources or services. (I'm usually not that blunt about it because it makes me sound like an MRA or misogynist, but it's true. And I'm still not an MRA or a misogynist.)
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I remember in the early 1980s the first time I heard Womens Hour reporting on CSA and its effects. Before that there was no language so it hadn't happened to me - it couldn't have happened. In fact, people have been misusing their power over others in every possible way for all time.

I hope you can continue to find the strength to give that language to other men.
I have to remember there never will be here, either, until men speak up in large numbers.
I've said it before: you have had such a positive impact on my life, where I now view situations involving men's trauma with more open eyes, and will speak up about it in conversation with others (I'm still learning, too, yeah).

But unfortunately it isn't my voice that is needed here.
And I'm still not an MRA or a misogynist.
I know. You're not.
You're a man, speaking out on a topic that desperately needs to be spoken out on.
Some women murder people.
Some women do other horrible things.
For the same kicks and giggles, power, authority for a time and what not cruel reasons.

... I didn't notice anyone would be discounting those, here. :)
So, yes, abuse is abuse no matter the form / who from.
I know three guys who are in or have been in dv relationships. One was mutual combat, one got the shit beat out of him on a regular basis and the other had screaming matches that the entire neighborhood got to see/hear experience. Which was bad because the victim half of that was also a cop.

It took women hundreds of years to get anyone to listen. It was even in many laws -- that you could beat your wife as long as you only used a certain sized stick. It was only 30 some years ago that women could report a rape by their husband. But once they finally stopped being quiet about it society started to agree it wasn't ok.

I think that is the process men are going to have to follow --- admitting that this is happening and going public to get it stopped. But as hard as it was for women I think it's even going to be harder for men because of the stigma.
It will take one step at a time.
It will move forward, slowly
But you will find others.... because if you are brave enough to talk about it then maybe it will encourage them to be brave too
I don't really have anything to add except to say that I am trying to follow along and support your recovery. Regardless of how many men it happens to, it happened to you and that is the most important thing. I say if it helps you to heal, talk about it. Sometimes it takes that open validation for someone else to be able to step up and say, "Yes, that happened to me too!"

I hope you find others that can relate to your specific set of circumstances. I wish I could be of more help, but my main experience is with SCA. *(and yes I turned the letters around on purpose because I feel it is more proper to say sexual child abuse (SCA) than it is to say child sexual abuse (CSA). Anyway, good for you for posting this thread, I hope it helps you to find healing!!!
I talked to a therapist last year who specialized in sexual abuse and she said she had never in her 20 years of practice met a guy (me) who was abused by a woman in childhood. So it may be not that common but it still happens! Guess I belong to a minority. I think it's great that you have concerns about men too, @bellbird! If only more people would acknowledge that women can be perpetrators too. We men really need to speak up
I think it's great that you have concerns about men too, @bellbird!
Thanks zi.
My passion (I think that word fits) for this issue has without a doubt been fueled by the passion of the OP, as well as by other brave men on the site (such as yourself) who've not only had to live through such atrocities, but also face the stigma that comes with it.

I know my voice might not be loud, but I want to speak out when/where I can.
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