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Reclaiming Life: What Are Your Goals?

Discussion in 'Social' started by Marilyn_S, Apr 30, 2007.

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  1. Marilyn_S

    Marilyn_S Well-Known Member

    I was talking with a friend of mine today and she mentioned one of her long term goals. It made me think about the purpose of goals and their importance in the healing process. Goals are a good way to help think about the future in a positive way while remaining mentally in the present. Each goal that can be marked off and accomplished is one more step in the healing process in that one is able to gather a mental picture of self worth. I believe that it is very important to start with small very specific short term goals then progress to mid term and long term goals. The short term goals are often steps toward accomplishing long term goals. Therefore, each short term goal marked off the list as accomplished doesn't seem so small any more and one begins to realize he/she is accomplishing more than he/she ever realized. My goals are as follows. Please feel free to share your goals on this thread if you are comfortable with doing so.

    Short Term:
    1.) Contact advisor at graduate school and acquire info on process of re entry.
    2.) Make a list of three self afferming statements daily as medicine for positive self worth
    3.) Get my house clean & keep it that way
    4.) Create family menu to organize family diet
    5.) Set up family meeting to discuss vacation ideas & summer plans

    Mid Term Goals:
    1.) Work toward getting back into graduate school
    2.) Get through, "The Courage to Heal Workbook" with my therapist
    3.) Get my 16 year old daughter set up with an orthadontist
    4.) Help my son with his reading skills
    5.) Plant and harvest a vegitable garden on unforested achreage
    6.) Develop a regular exercise regimine
    7.) Develop a healthy sleep time ritual

    Long Term Goals:
    1.) Loose 35 lbs
    2.) Healing from PTSD to stable non labile affect, healthy rational thinking, and improved self esteem daily
    3.) Get my Licensing credentials as a masters level social worker
    4.) Establish a family health centered non profit healing and personal growth center for survivors both child and adult
    5.) Get my poetry and the four children's picture books I've written and illistrated published.
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  3. Marilyn_S

    Marilyn_S Well-Known Member

    I started this thread because it has been so helpful in my healing process to extablish concrete goals. I was hoping it might help others to think about and share their goals. One's goals may be centered around healing or self improvement or may be even monitary gain. All goals are lagitimate however great or small they may be. Some of my long term goals are almost in the catagory of dreams because even if they never come to pass I can say that I am at least working toward my dreams. Everybody's goals and dreams will be different. I think this is a healthy exercise and hope someone will join me in sharing their goals.
  4. Claire

    Claire Well-Known Member

    I've been thinking about it Marilyn, honestly I have!

    Here's a brief list:

    Short term:

    1. Lose weight and get back to what I was before my crash. This will help me with my windsurfing. You go faster in lighter winds if you are lighter!

    2. Get fitter and compete in some sort of race (running and/or biking, maybe a mini triatholon)

    3. Finish my logo and identity for my business. I've been procrastinating for far too long with this one. Lots of excuses but I need to do it and it will be really good when I've done it. It'll help me get more work in the long run.

    4. Make a success of my move to the coast. (This one is taking a lot of work!)

    Long term:

    1. Run another marathon

    Others that I haven't worked out yet:

    1. Something to do with working with children, I did a little voluntering with autistic kids and I enjoyed that. Or teaching an after school class or something, not sure.

    2. I got some details about a charity where you can walk old peoples dogs. If the owners get ill or have to go to hospital you look after their pets by walking them. Might do that too.
  5. Monarch

    Monarch I'm a VIP Premium Member

    goal list:

    Wow, good idea Marilyn:

    1. just like the 2 of you, lose weight (woman's curse). Eat healthy whole organic foods.

    2. get spending of money under control, pay off some bills

    3. Go to the Dr. and get my Knee and ankle looked at, probably need Knee surgery, not looking forward to that. Exercise as much as possible.

    4. finish remodel of basement (working on this)

    5. Learn to take time for myself and quit working my 70 hour weeks.

    6. Work hard in therapy, forgive people, work on my self-esteem.

    7. spend more time with my kids

    8. look into other voluteer opportunities for the summer, something I can do with my kids.
  6. mouse

    mouse Well-Known Member

    Great Idea I have a few less goals ight now but they are:
    Short Term
    1-Get healed well enough from my wreck that I can hold Tara again
    2- notbe so quick to anger at my hubby when he doesnt know how to react to my PTSD,
    3. Ride my Sportbike again regulary

    Long Term Goals
    1-Due to concussion this has to go here But Join the gym again,when I quit working lost that privilage
    2-Play Ball again Womens Fastball
    3- volunteer at the PARTY program-- A Group of Dr,. , nurses, Medics, Rehab services and people who are injured provide very hard core in depth tours and lectures as to the dangers of not only drinking and drivig buut fooling around In the program you have a brief slideshow lecture by the medics with still pics from horrific scenes and they discusse what we do and ho, then it moves down the chain all the way to rehab and then a guest speaker who has been injured talks about how life has changed for them -- Then we have lunch and each person is given a fake injury some are paraylsed, some are blindfolded, some are brain injured, so they eat with one eye covered for depth perssession,I used to to it and found it rewarding .--mabe oe day i'll be able to do it again
  7. kers

    kers I'm a VIP

    Short-Term Goals:

    1. When someone is angry, leave before I dissociate or freak out
    2. Follow my bedtime routine
    3. Buy a bike
    4. Reduce the number of times I beat up on myself each day!

    Long-Term Goals:

    1. Rely on dissociation and self-harm less frequently
    2. Accept my emotions instead of rejecting them
    3. Fluctuate less wildly with my emotions
    4. Write a children's book (I'm with you on this, Marilyn!)
    5. Begin dating again
  8. Lisa

    Lisa Well-Known Member

    Short term
    1. Lose weight
    2. Take up an interest - maybe kickboxing again
    3. Get driving license (only because I have to have one to work in the future)
    4. Get a motorbike!
    Long term
    1. Better my social life at University
    2. Get to know my brothers better
    3. Be less worried about what people think
    4. Have control over my concentration levels - actually study when I plan to!
    5. Be less avoidant of dealing with things in my mind
    6. Have control over PTSD (and all associated issues like insomnia, nightmares, flashbacks, grief, guilt, shame etc. etc.) - The Big One!
    7. Get my degree, and on to a Clinical Psychology Course
    8. Overcome my issues surrounding intimate relationships - I want a boyfriend without it being traumatic!
  9. batgirl

    batgirl I'm a VIP

    This is a good idea Marilyn. I didn't respond until today because of recent events in my family, which I am only just beginning to come to terms with. In any event, here is my goal list:

    • continue with my current comic book inking job, and gain as much experience as I can, so I can get hired by a bigger publishing company
    • self-publish my own comics
    • go to Japan to study manga
    • gain 6 kg so I am at a healthy weight (currently 42 kg, want to be 48 kg)
    • become healthy enough so that I can participate in my old sports activities, such as mountain biking, rock climbing, soccer/football
    • grow out my hair again
    • have laser surgery on my stomach to remove scars
    • get closer to all my family members
    • have a boyfriend
    • get married
    • have a child
    • get a driver's license and buy a car
    • renew my pilot's license
    • move out of my uncle and aunt's house and have a flat in the city
    • heal my PTSD to the point where I can have a normal life again
  10. Marlene

    Marlene I'm a VIP Premium Member

    I wasn't going to post on this thread because right now...I have no goals right now. The first time I read this thread I felt really bad because I couldn't come up with one single thing to write.

    I've become so focused with living in the present (going forward more than a couple of days is just too much to handle right now) that I don't even think about the next day until the morning when I open my eyes. What's really weird is that before the PTSD symptoms went out of control on me, I was one that made lists, made plans and had tons of goals. Now I just concentrate on the day I'm in.

    I've been told that I'm rebuilding my foundation and when it's strong and stable once again I'll move onto the next level and back to more what was normal for me. And then my goals will return.

    So I guess I do have a goal after all. Continuing rebuilding my foundation.
  11. BassistKara

    BassistKara Active Member

    Some of the things on my list at the moment:

    * Find out whats physically wrong with me and making me sick all the time and hopefully get it to a bareable point

    *Getting anxiety under control

    *Allowing myself to be loved and cared for

    *Starting a band and play shows, tour etc etc.

    *Go back to studying...probably start off with diploma of youth work then go to bachelor of arts in sociology

    *Becoming less self destructive

    *Start being able to have healthy relationships.

    *Write a book of some sorts!

    *Get more motivated so i can finish all my sewing projects that i start!

    * And ultimately gain control over my PTSD, which i guess some of these fall into anyway!
  12. Marilyn_S

    Marilyn_S Well-Known Member

    In rereading my goals I realized I had things horses hiney end backwards. So I must say this. My first and foremost goal is to healing. My PTSD is so bad I've been hospitalized 2 times in less than three months. I still believe in my goals but nothing is more pressing at this time than my own healing. I can't be the best person I can be by sticking my head in the sand and pretending I am OK, cause I'm not! So, my revised main priority goals are as follows:

    1.) Healing and consistent stabalization from my PTSD.
    2.) Filing for Social Security Disability so I can focus on healing rather than alot of other stuff that will only put me deeper in the PTSD hole.
    3.) Not isolating but taking time to enjoy my precious family and my good friends so that I can have a more positive focus in life.
  13. JadeSquirrel

    JadeSquirrel I'm a VIP Premium Member

    My goals:

    1.) Get myself stabalized

    2.) Stop allowing others to use/abuse me

    3.) Build confidence

    4.) Get over alot of my fears/phobias

    5.) Get a better job

    6.) Learn to be more independent

    7.) Get out of this marriage, if it's for the best
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