Background info first: I've shared before. I grew up in a strict religion that some cult experts consider either a cult or high control group. I didn't like being part of it growing up because it separated me from family members, class mates, etc. But, I totally fell for all the religion's BS when I was a teen and got baptised and started following all their requirements the best I could. I literally believed that by strictly following all their requirements, it would help me be close to God and fix my life of all possible dysfunction in me that was caused by growing up in a very abusive, weird and dysfunctional family. It would fix me. I became very zealous and even believed that this religion would solve all of "mankind's problems". Ironically, following this cult and having a purpose in life helped me feel good about myself believing I was saving people's lives and a part of something good. It also helped give me strength somehow to combat PTSD symptoms, "be a good person" ( whatever that means, lol), and cope with unwanted intrusive thoughts and rise above all the crap from my childhood. I thought this religion was helping me with my life and literally saving my life. Also, because of the strict requirements in the religion, I never became addicted to drugs, ciggs, sex or alcohol. BUT I also felt like my life was not fun and unfullfilled. I ALWAYS wanted to do what everyone else was doing, not saying drugs, but normal socializing and enjoying life. But I kept strict for the religion. Then I cracked and sabotaged my life and any happiness I had and now I am struggling with alcohol and trying to repair what damage I did to my life and "fix myself". So now, I'm definitely wondering if religion or at least a religious cult could take the place of addiction to a substance? Like can you be addicted to a high control religion/group like you would a substance like alcohol, ect. And if you grow up in a high control group, how does that affect you?