Hi all, can you please help me with some advice, I am 29 years old, I have been treated for CPTSD for over 5 years, at first I was treated for avoidant and dependent personality disorder, but then the doctor said I have a lot of developmental trauma, and I have a complex trauma. I have been treated with a schema therapist and my traumas have not been treated at all because I can talk about them and feel nothing, like I am detached from them. The doctor tried a lot, hundreds of times, over the course of 5 years, we tried to work on the injuries, but all to nothing, I only got worse and my defenses didn't loosen up. And the doctor decided to consult with the schema therapy institute, and they recommended a fast-track protocol, 20 sessions in a row, 2-3 traumas each session, and they said it would overcome the dissociation. But after that I stopped eating, shaving, washing, lost my cognitive skills, and I haven't been back for 1.5 years. It felt like I went crazy after that. I lost my smells, my tastes, and never came back. I can hardly even use my phone anymore. I have heard of such cases, but what do I do now? I have amnesia now, too. Now I am looking for a new therapist, and I found one, EMDR, and he suggests going into trauma, after the 2nd session, I am afraid I will just lose my mind or kill myself. What do you do in these situations?