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Scared to go on holiday

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Eliza

Confident
Hello,

So I have to fly on Friday and I am getting more and more panicky.

My PTSD is nothing to do with flying (but it is related to terrorism). I've never been scared to fly before (but I haven't flown since the attack).

It's bothering me because I saw something weird on the tube the other day and it made me super anxious,and I'm scared because if I see someone acting weird on the plane, I can't just get off at the next stop, and even if it's not a threat, I will end up panicking the entire 8 hours. Plus, I'm also worried about having some freak accident, or the plane going missing, or all sorts of ridiculously unlikely (but slightly possible) things. I'm worried the slightest bit of turbulence will set me off panicking.

And because I'm scared of having a panic attack, it's making me panic, which obviously makes a panic attack more likely.

Not to mention I'm scared of getting there and being shot, stabbed, attacked, blown up, ran over and all sorts of ridiculous things.

I know it's all incredibly unlikely, but then it was incredibly unlikely that I would have been on Westminster Bridge when I was, and that happened.

My therapist gave me some mindfulness/grounding techniques during our last session, but does anybody else have any grounding techniques they have found useful?

Alternatively if anyone could just send some positivity my way and make me feel generally better - I'd appreciate that too!
 
This breathing exercise greatly helped me (and still does) get my anxiety under control...so much so I no longer needed to take medication to keep it in check. (I didn't quit them cold turkey, but rather worked closely with my doc to taper off and eventually quit)

I continue to practice it daily, most especially when I'm not feeling anxious, and it eventually became my automatic response to stress, even of the good variety. It's free, easy to do, and available 24/7, which is unlike all the other methods I'd tried up to that point.

May you find it helpful and may your nervous system be able to relax enough so you can actually enjoy your trip:
Rhythmic Stress Relief: Stopwatch Tap Technique with Jim Donovan
 
I tend to get in loops where I fear fear and panic about panic before I do something.

Two things that help me:

Distractions. Not escapes, that’s a little different. But mindfully telling myself i’ll Worry about that later (I will even literally sch duke a time to worry about it on my calendar) and then doing something else, and it’s like my brain will give up the fear for a bit.

Imagining the event going well. This can be hard to do, and I sometimes have to turn it into a totally impossible fantasy that is totally silly to get my brain to do it. (I walk into the airport and someone tells me I just won the lottery...) This is a CBT technique and it’s usually taught with realistic imagining, which is actually even more powerful if I can do that, but I sometimes I can not believe a real realistic positive version, so my therapist said to just have fun with it. The point is to get the brain to rehearse a different option, instead of rehearsing the fear. It is often taught with statements like “I walk into the airport and I take a deep slow breath in and feel much more present and relaxed. I go up to the check in line and...” — this is where someone mentally rehearses using coping skills and those skills working. For some, it can actually increase the coping tools working. (In the same way rehearsing the panic reinforces the panic.)

Just two things to perhaps try. I hope you find the tools that work best for you. :hug:
 
Hi @Eliza.... Drugs..... Ask the doctor for something tomorrow.... Something to calm you... Not beta blockers... Maybe some diazepam.... Explain your symptoms.. Your fears....Usually you can phone docs and ask to speak to duty doc.. Who phones you back... I'm sure you know you're own way with your surgery.... You will be fine....
 
Hi @Eliza.... Drugs..... Ask the doctor for something tomorrow.... Something to calm you... Not beta blockers... Maybe some diazepam....
Actually, I would advise against seeking benzos a a primary coping tool for flying. I thought of using benzos for travel myself until my trauma therapist explained how they can backfire and lead to longer lasting anxiety. Emergency anti-anxiety medications might help to have on hand in case of an extreme emergency where it is take the medication or get hospitalized (and thus do not take the flight). However, outside of that kind of situation, numerous studies have been done that show that taking an anti-anxiety medication for flying will actually prolong a fear of flying and can backfire significantly. Plus, additional studies have shown that while the person might feel more relaxed, they physiologically actually become more activated and condition the body and brain to be anxious even more when flying. Anti-Anxiety Medication and Flying

I still have an emergency anti-anxiety medications on hand, but I only take them knowing they are an option of last resort and not really a solution to resolving the anxiety itself.
 
<chuckling> I'm the opposite of @Justmehere If I'm not flying regularly enough to be nonplussed by it? Smartest thing for me to do is to take a Valium the day before I'm flying out, and then again before leaving for the airport or just after arriving.

I don't have a fear of flying, though.

For me'self it's just massive stress (stress cup !), combined with not being in control, combined with the almost inevitable triggering of myself as I get all grumpy about civilian flying vs military flying (why the f*ck do I love love love coming in hot, and combat landings, and close calls, and storms, and.... But here in placid-land of nothing-to-actually-worry-about get all freaked out? I mean, really, the f*ck is that nonsense?). And then I very quickly lose my ever-lovin' mind, and am spitting nails trying to remain in control, become almost instantly unwilling to do anything to take the edge off (if I'm gonna die stupid and bloody, dammit, I will be effing awake & aware of it! :mad: <cough> :rolleyes: ) And then? Things reeeeally start to go downhill. At which point I'm gonna be in a bad cycle for at least about a month. The whole thing just ticks over like dominos. All of which is easily averted by 1-3 Valium. Voila! Better living through chemistry. Check.
 
Hi @Eliza.... Drugs
I have Beta Blockers that I take for general anxiety, but I also have sleeping tablets and as it's an overnight flight, I think taking one of those might relax me as well as help me get a few hours' kip? Because I don't want to rely on anxiety drugs because then the anxiety won't lessen (I've learnt this the hard way - I'm now scared of basically everything!)

Will someone be traveling with you?
Unfortunately not, which is part of my current problem - the furthest I've flown on my own before is an hour up to Scotland. Now I'm going transatlantic! But I am meeting friends there, so I will at least have that to calm my anxiety when I arrive!

However, outside of that kind of situation, numerous studies have been done that show that taking an anti-anxiety medication for flying will actually prolong a fear of flying and can backfire significantly. Plus, additional studies have shown that while the person might feel more relaxed, they physiologically actually become more activated and condition the body and brain to be anxious even more when flying.
You're right - I don't want to rely on anxiety medication because I currently take beta blockers, but my fear of life in general is actually getting worse. My CBT therapist has recommended these exposure exercises, so dealing with things slowly, eg. sitting on the tube without my headphones on/without my nose in a book so I can experience the anxiety and show that it eases over time. And I would hope it would ease over 8 hours!!
I have Rescue Remedy which is a natural remedy thing for anxiety, and I have my sleeping tablets which I'm hoping will allow me to sleep/relax a little. But I don't want to take actual anxiety medication.
 
Hello. Since you asked for reassurance, would it possibly help and calm your anxiety by reminding yourself that, in the event that you do see something suspicious, you can contact a flight attendant and they'll be able to help keep watch or notify the pilot, in case they need to turn around or make an emergency landing in another small island or another country (for example, Bermuda, or perhaps Greenland, if your flight is heading to the U.S.)?
 
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