Session today dissociation test

Taylor27

Learning
Hi everyone, I just got home from my session with my therapist. I finally went through the test to see how much i dissociate. I am on the very high precentage and she needs time to see what the plan is for how we proceed with therapy. I just feel like she might give up on me because im so high and i think it too her for surprise how much this impacts my life. I think i am making good progress and no one has ever listened to me like she has.
 

RussellSue

Not Active
I think i am making good progress and no one has ever listened to me like she has.
That's huge. I had a decent therapist tell me she wasn't sure if she could help me and I told her basically what you said about your therapist and she stayed on board.

If she starts to feel like she can't help, you telling her that she already has been might change her mind. I think most good therapists hate to send anyone away if they feel they can help them.
 

Sideways

Sponsor
I'd go a long way to find a T who is prepared to utilise a variety of different resources to (a) understand exactly what's going on for me; and (b) make sure that they have the necessary qualifications and experience to actually help me.

IME? There's not nearly enough Ts who have the professional integrity to do that.

There's a lot of up sides to this: knowing your mental health situation better, knowing what further inquiries are now appropriate (okay, so you dissociate a lot - where does that place you on the spectrum of dissociative disorders, though? That's tougher to figure out), knowing the type of strategies that are now going to be necessary to keep your therapy on track (cause probably there's dissociation happening around therapy appointments, which makes recovery a lot slower than it needs to be - a grounding kit that you can carry around with you may be your new best friend), and is this T the right fit, given your mental health situation?

If they're not the right fit (worst case scenario, but good to find out sooner rather than later after they've dragged you through years of unhelpful, potentially even harmful therapy), it isn't the case that you're left to figure things out alone. Getting a referral from this T to someone better qualified to help you? Is a great way to go. And there's also the possibility of a transition period while you get comfortable working with someone new. And that's worst case.

So, it's news that can be pretty distressing to receive. But it's going to be okay. It's common with cptsd to have a high level of dissociation. Knowing yourself better, understanding how your dissociation presents, is helpful for your recovery:)
 

Friday

Moderator
I'd go a long way to find a T who is prepared to utilise a variety of different resources to (a) understand exactly what's going on for me; and (b) make sure that they have the necessary qualifications and experience to actually help me.

IME? There's not nearly enough Ts who have the professional integrity to do that.
This.
I just feel like she might give up on me because im so high and i think it too her for surprise how much this impacts my life
If you have an amazing GP that is your favorite doctor of all time... and they refer you to see a cardiologist? That’s not your GP giving up on you. That’s your GP referring you to a specialist to get you the expertise you deserve.

The cardiologist they refer you to? Might be just as amazing as they are (doctors are like every other group of professionals. The amazing ones tend to be friends &/or respected colleagues, meanwhile the middling ones band together, and the crap ones, etc. All you reeeeally need for top flight medical care? Just one amazing doctor, to refer you to all of his/her amazing friends). OR? The cardiologist might be someone you dislike, and don’t get on with, regardless of what their medical skills are, and you need to find another one. OR? That cardiologist may have a colleague who specializes in exactly the heart condition you’re dealing with, and so they refer you on, again. None of these doctors are “giving up on you”. Nor does seeing them mean that you have to quit seeing your amazing GP. Even if -worst case scenario- you’re about to be a ‘heart patient’ (instead of a general patient / well patient) who is half living in your cardiologists office for the next year or two... as soon as your heart stuff that needs the specialist is sorted? It’s right back to the only doc you see is your fave GP

Therapists? Are the same way. The amazing ones don’t try to do it all themselves. They refer their clients onto specialists, when what the client needs is outside their skill set AND? When confronted with new information that is totally within their skill set, they still take the time to design & implement a totally new treatment plan... rather than doggedly sticking with what they had originally planned.

Both? Referring clients to specialists & taking the time to evaluate, design, & implement a new plan? Are very very good things.

Ditto, a great therapist isn’t just going to show you the door. They’re going to help you FIND a specialist (even if they don’t know any, they can walk you through the process, and be there for you as you try and find someone) AND -even if they want you to take a break wih them to focus on the specialist? Will ALSO help you transition, and still be there & happy to see you, once you’ve completed your specialist work & are ready to return to less specialized therapy.

AKA What @Sideways said. If you’ve got a great therapist? The worst case scenario is still pretty freaking amazing.
 

Taylor27

Learning
Hiya @Taylor27, what kinds of things do they do in a Dissociation test?
Thank you for asking. It was the questions where about losing focus, out of body experience and other things that where related to PTSD.

That's huge. I had a decent therapist tell me she wasn't sure if she could help me and I told her basically what you said about your therapist and she stayed on board.

If she starts to feel like she can't help, you telling her that she already has been might change her mind. I think most good therapists hate to send anyone away if they feel they can help them.
Thank you, I told her this morning how much I think im making progress with her. That really helped her to tell me that she wants to try other things with me at a slower pace that im comfortable with. I think right after the test was gone she may of felt therapy was not very helpful for me til i explained further.

I'd go a long way to find a T who is prepared to utilise a variety of different resources to (a) understand exactly what's going on for me; and (b) make sure that they have the necessary qualifications and experience to actually help me.

IME? There's not nearly enough Ts who have the professional integrity to do that.

There's a lot of up sides to this: knowing your mental health situation better, knowing what further inquiries are now appropriate (okay, so you dissociate a lot - where does that place you on the spectrum of dissociative disorders, though? That's tougher to figure out), knowing the type of strategies that are now going to be necessary to keep your therapy on track (cause probably there's dissociation happening around therapy appointments, which makes recovery a lot slower than it needs to be - a grounding kit that you can carry around with you may be your new best friend), and is this T the right fit, given your mental health situation?

If they're not the right fit (worst case scenario, but good to find out sooner rather than later after they've dragged you through years of unhelpful, potentially even harmful therapy), it isn't the case that you're left to figure things out alone. Getting a referral from this T to someone better qualified to help you? Is a great way to go. And there's also the possibility of a transition period while you get comfortable working with someone new. And that's worst case.

So, it's news that can be pretty distressing to receive. But it's going to be okay. It's common with cptsd to have a high level of dissociation. Knowing yourself better, understanding how your dissociation presents, is helpful for your recovery:)
Thank you, this therapist I have been with her now for 19 months and is really helping me. I think she is trying to determine how to best help me as much as she can.

This.

If you have an amazing GP that is your favorite doctor of all time... and they refer you to see a cardiologist? That’s not your GP giving up on you. That’s your GP referring you to a specialist to get you the expertise you deserve.

The cardiologist they refer you to? Might be just as amazing as they are (doctors are like every other group of professionals. The amazing ones tend to be friends &/or respected colleagues, meanwhile the middling ones band together, and the crap ones, etc. All you reeeeally need for top flight medical care? Just one amazing doctor, to refer you to all of his/her amazing friends). OR? The cardiologist might be someone you dislike, and don’t get on with, regardless of what their medical skills are, and you need to find another one. OR? That cardiologist may have a colleague who specializes in exactly the heart condition you’re dealing with, and so they refer you on, again. None of these doctors are “giving up on you”. Nor does seeing them mean that you have to quit seeing your amazing GP. Even if -worst case scenario- you’re about to be a ‘heart patient’ (instead of a general patient / well patient) who is half living in your cardiologists office for the next year or two... as soon as your heart stuff that needs the specialist is sorted? It’s right back to the only doc you see is your fave GP

Therapists? Are the same way. The amazing ones don’t try to do it all themselves. They refer their clients onto specialists, when what the client needs is outside their skill set AND? When confronted with new information that is totally within their skill set, they still take the time to design & implement a totally new treatment plan... rather than doggedly sticking with what they had originally planned.

Both? Referring clients to specialists & taking the time to evaluate, design, & implement a new plan? Are very very good things.

Ditto, a great therapist isn’t just going to show you the door. They’re going to help you FIND a specialist (even if they don’t know any, they can walk you through the process, and be there for you as you try and find someone) AND -even if they want you to take a break wih them to focus on the specialist? Will ALSO help you transition, and still be there & happy to see you, once you’ve completed your specialist work & are ready to return to less specialized therapy.

AKA What @Sideways said. If you’ve got a great therapist? The worst case scenario is still pretty freaking amazing.
I think my therapist is going to work with me still, she is one of the best therapist I have had. I also have a very good family doctor too that helps me too. I have this fear of abandonment
 

Sideways

Sponsor
I have this fear of abandonment
Depending on which text you read from? This is sometimes considered one of the symptoms of cptsd. So, you're in good company here:)

It's great that you have the insight already to know that's what's going on for you internally. After only 19 months in therapy you should high five yourself for that, because it's notoriously difficult for people to identify in themselves.

It sounds like you're in pretty good hands for where you are at the moment. Knowing that you spend a lot of time dissociated (coping mechanism, so it's not all bad) means you can now work on gaining the skills to get it under control. And that's all good news, because this is a new thing you're doing. It's something you've been doing for a long time and simply living with. Now you know what's going on, and what it's called? You can start to decide for yourself how you want to manage it, when it needs managing, and when you're happy to let it ride to get you through tough patches (which it can be helpful for).
 
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