Should I have immediately disliked this person?

Status
Not open for further replies.

littleoc

Sponsor
I was gaming with a group on Discord (it’s like Skype but with video games as the focus) and, long story short, the leader of the group started grilling me about my political beliefs because she was suspicious that I wasn’t a liberal.

I told her I’m not far left nor far right. So she started asking me about my thoughts on abortion. To find out “how conservative you are.”

(By the way, if this thread becomes political, it is off topic. I’ll lock it. Please don’t do it.)

I assumed she’d not be one of those people who is intolerant of all other opinions. I have no idea if I was right, but I’m writing this post because I am confused about something.

When I explained to her that I’m a biologist but don’t know much about human babies and development of embryos and, therefore, was not comfortable giving an exact point where I thought abortion would be okay (she asked), I began trying to change the subject to something I knew wouldn’t be an issue for anyone. Because it’s like four am (this happened an hour ago) and I don’t feel like debating while playing this little children’s game.

I started explaining the cool proven facts I know about unborn babies (I’m too tired to share right now, just know that unborn babies are still learning and it’s very cool!) and then talked about how my state once accidentally allowed fully born newborn babies to be mrudered — not that people were doing it — and suddenly she (leader of the group) asked me, “Well, it’s just a baby, right?”

So my question is this. Is this normal in some way or should I be concerned?

I have never met anyone except my psycho father who said that murdering an actual baby is okay? I half wonder if she misheard me?

??????

I can’t tell if I’m triggered or not. I think I’m not, I believe I’m just annoyed that someone would suggest this. But I’m a very protective person who cares about everyone. And clearly this person isn’t empathetic. And maybe is secretly a Spartan. (Ten points if you got the “joke.”) She called me by the same name as my abuse ex did though, so. I’m sort of thinking that my bad vibes I felt happened for a reason. (My ex Brandi was once relieved when two babies in my family died because she didn’t like their mother, and Brandi felt it was better to have two dead babies than a “bad mom.” Long story short.)

What do y’all think? Am I right to immediately dislike this person, or am I being confused about something?

She seemed really stupid honestly. Kicked a dude out for asking why she named the group “gay rights.”

Sorry for rambling, I haven’t slept in a while. What do you think? It’s not really in my nature to dislike someone immediately, but... Devils’ advocates, got anything?
 

Neverthesame

Not Active
I think you just ran into one of those basement dwelling extreme leftist "woke" types.

In my experience, anyone whose political views are that polarised in either direction, can't be reasoned with. If you don't agree 100% with whatever their dialectical beliefs dictate, you are the enemy.
Both the left and right have these people in their ranks.
I wouldn't take it personal, they'll do enough of that for the both of you.
 

Neverthesame

Not Active
I would call them "indoctrinated".
I don't know if they're looking for a fight so much as looking for an outrage to virtue signal over.

Sort of like a peacock strutting around with it's plumage. When there's no peahen around, it's a display for territory rather than sex.

To most people outside the chicken coop, it's a silly bird flapping around and sqaking about some little thing.
Good fun to sit back and watch with a bag of popcorn. ;)

Less fun to be stuck on the receiving end of, unless you're trolling them that is... :troll:
 

frogthroat

Not Active
I think you just ran into one of those basement dwelling extreme leftist "woke" types.
Agreed.

Also, it's okay to immediately dislike someone. Everyone comes across people they just don't like. It's totally normal. Nobody is going to like everyone. Plus, there are people out there that just don't want to be liked. I think this person is an example of that. When I come across people who want to fight about everything I nope right out of there.

Also, I wanted to add something because it's relavant and this subject brought this particular thing up.
Awhile ago I watched this show/documentary? and one of the the women they were talking to was an extreme animal rights activist. She was militant vegan, she did protests, and wouldn't even let her roommates put animal products on her shelf in the fridge. I thought she was insane and self righteous but then she told her story. When she was a kid her little sister was kidnapped and brutally murdered in the woods. When she found out how animals are slaughtered she said she thought of her sister dying in excruciating pain, scared, and alone and that's when she began going vegan and advocating for animal rights.
I don't even remember what the show was but that has haunted me forever. I think it's important to note that many of these extreme people have extreme wounds. It doesn't mean you have to agree with them but that gave me the ability to empathize with them more.
 

Gs172003

MyPTSD Pro
I was gaming with a group on Discord (it’s like Skype but with video games as the focus) and, long story short, the leader of the group started grilling me about my political beliefs because she was suspicious that I wasn’t a liberal.

I told her I’m not far left nor far right. So she started asking me about my thoughts on abortion. To find out “how conservative you are.”

(By the way, if this thread becomes political, it is off topic. I’ll lock it. Please don’t do it.)

I assumed she’d not be one of those people who is intolerant of all other opinions. I have no idea if I was right, but I’m writing this post because I am confused about something.

When I explained to her that I’m a biologist but don’t know much about human babies and development of embryos and, therefore, was not comfortable giving an exact point where I thought abortion would be okay (she asked), I began trying to change the subject to something I knew wouldn’t be an issue for anyone. Because it’s like four am (this happened an hour ago) and I don’t feel like debating while playing this little children’s game.

I started explaining the cool proven facts I know about unborn babies (I’m too tired to share right now, just know that unborn babies are still learning and it’s very cool!) and then talked about how my state once accidentally allowed fully born newborn babies to be mrudered — not that people were doing it — and suddenly she (leader of the group) asked me, “Well, it’s just a baby, right?”

So my question is this. Is this normal in some way or should I be concerned?

I have never met anyone except my psycho father who said that murdering an actual baby is okay? I half wonder if she misheard me?

??????

I can’t tell if I’m triggered or not. I think I’m not, I believe I’m just annoyed that someone would suggest this. But I’m a very protective person who cares about everyone. And clearly this person isn’t empathetic. And maybe is secretly a Spartan. (Ten points if you got the “joke.”) She called me by the same name as my abuse ex did though, so. I’m sort of thinking that my bad vibes I felt happened for a reason. (My ex Brandi was once relieved when two babies in my family died because she didn’t like their mother, and Brandi felt it was better to have two dead babies than a “bad mom.” Long story short.)

What do y’all think? Am I right to immediately dislike this person, or am I being confused about something?

She seemed really stupid honestly. Kicked a dude out for asking why she named the group “gay rights.”

Sorry for rambling, I haven’t slept in a while. What do you think? It’s not really in my nature to dislike someone immediately, but... Devils’ advocates, got anything?
That person had no right to question your beliefs. Period.
 

Muttly

MyPTSD Pro
I just want to echo what @Just-a-lady said. It's ok to dislike someone just because you dislike them. This is something my T has been working to get me to understand. It's one of those things that's easier for me to tell others than to actually do. It's also perfectly ok to tell someone you don't want to talk about something.

And there's huge red flags. Someone who is "grilling" you on anything likely has an agenda. And if they have an agenda, it's not a mutual beneficial friendship they are after. Saying "it's just a baby" is serious creepy in my book.
 

Friday

Moderator
1. There is no “should”. You can take an immediate dislike to anyone, for any reason, at any time. You’re not obligated to remain neutral, much less to like someone, until they prove themselves an asshole. You can simply dislike them. And that’s okay.

2. This is gaming. People espouse all kinds of bizarre ideologies, troll, grief, & be toxic... just to amuse themselves whilst gaming. Because it’s just another game to them. No need to give anyone online the benefit of the doubt? x1000

One of my son’s regular discord groups started a thing a few years back where they pretend to be genocidal figures from history and get points based on a) how well they espouse that particular individuals views in the current day a2) if they can expose someone else’s views as being false to their ideology, b) how many new people joining the group actually believe any of what they say b2) the degree of their reactions including invitations to modern hate groups and attempts to shut their server down // either extreme accrues maximum points/bragging rights, c) if they can cause any member of their own group to break character (either by laughing or by losing their temper, more points for losing their temper). They choose different individuals all the time. My kid likes to go for the hard win of f*cking with someone in their own group, so he’s become near expert on iron curtain war criminals and despots since more than half of them are Eastern European.

<<< Yep. It’s a bizarre and complicated game, thats been years in the making /started off as a lark and has become layered with rules and bylaws I’m not even touching right now ((and it’s hilaaaaaarious :banghead: when they attract the attention of various hackers and authorities, which they have a few times -that we know of- :banghead: , as both realise a lot faster these are kids just f*cking around // probably by deep diving their systems & servers & getting docs on them OMFG it drives me spare, don’t even get me started on the stack of manifestos -actual f*cking manifestos- in my kids room that he uses to pull quotes out of... but they love it. ME, I’ve dealt with far too many unimaginative buearocratic f*cktards on power trips to find that kind of shit funny. One of these days they’re going to run afoul of the wrong moron and we’re gonna be sitting in a small windowless room being denied access to a lawyer. Unless that’s just me catastrophizing. But i’m Not actually sure it’s possible to give bureaucratic f*cktards too little credit.)) ... that’s running in the background of the game they’re actually playing. Gamers do that kind of shit. They play games.

<<< How much of a military history nerd you have to be to track down the regiment stationed in one of the players towns and enumerate individual war crimes just to f*ck with someone to accrue points / bragging rights? Beggars description. And yet? The deep web/dark net whatever one wants to call it is probably an equal mix of seriously bad juju, teenage idiots, & OCD record keepers. A teenage idiot f*cking with his friends and OCD record keepers are a match made in heaven. And it’s just another kind of game to them. Seriously, UN investigators need to start hiring gamers, the same way geneticists & scientists have started turning their problems over to these agile minds without a purpose https://gizmodo.com/gamers-crack-code-that-could-lead-to-new-aids-treatment-5841782 Over a decade of serious scientific research... cracked in 3 weeks.
 
Last edited:

Freida

Sponsor
WTH???

you were playing a video game and someone started yapping at you about your political beliefs? What kind of nonsense is that?

I dislike her and I wasn't even involved --- so yep. It's totally possible (and OK) to dislike someone right off the bat. It's also ok to say -- I'm not going to discuss this with you so drop it. If they don't just refuse to engage. You NEVER have to justify your beliefs to anyone else. Especially to people that are just looking for a fight.
 

littleoc

Sponsor
Oh! I thought it was rude to dislike someone, lol.

Must be me remembering what it feels like to be disliked, but to be fair, I’m not bullying anyone.

But now that y’all have logic’ed at me I realized that I don’t care when people dislike me anymore (unless im alone in Iceland but that’s a long story) and haven’t assumed others were rude. Odd!

Thanks yall

And @Just-a-lady that’s sort of how I see it, though I’m not as extreme. I do eat meat occasionally. That’s really sad though :(
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top