Silence

Starfire

Confident
Was out in the country. I mean real country. My friend's 100 acres. Can't even see neighbors' homes. No street signs cuz everyone who lives there knows! No a sound, No cars driving by. No dogs barking. No birds chirping.

They left me alone to show others around. Suddenly the silence became frightening. Felt a panic attack starting so quickly I couldn't think to do anything.

Have no idea what happened. Suddenly it was an hour later. People were sitting again in the shade discussing how jealous they were of her being able to live in such a beautiful setting.
She has PTSD. Think she knew something happened cuz she started an activity for me to concentrate on.

When I got home...an hour and a half drive, I unconsciously grabbed the remote turning on the TV. Suddenly realized that's standard procedure. TV is always on. First thing done in morning. Sometimes even fall asleep with it on.
 
I mean real country. My friend's 100 acres. Can't even see neighbors' homes. No street signs cuz everyone who lives there knows! No a sound, No cars driving by. No dogs barking. No birds chirping.

^I'm the opposite - that sense of space is divine for me and I begin to crave it if I don't get regular doses of it.

My biggest problem with where I live relates to the fact that now I must live closer to ppl and facilities for convenience but the wider open spaces settle my spirit and help me rest.

But I do too pop the telly on for some background noise in the morning but it doesn't stay on for long - cannot handle the stupidity and the feeling that the world isn't really getting to be a better place much.
 
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