RussellSue
Not Active
So, I applied to work at the Goodwill, again... If I get something, this will be round 3 for me at the Goodwill but I'm not looking for full-time this time. I was laid off from an Oregon Goodwill due to Covid in April - I'm now applying at a Goodwill in NM.
Working at a Goodwill store isn't exactly a great career move for me but I don't know what else to do. This time it actually is a retail store - I have never actually worked at a Goodwill store before - I worked eCommerce last and a military food service gig that Goodwill had a contract for in 2008.
The fact is that I know that within the next few years I will be confined to working from home - no question. My hips are in bad shape but no one will replace them for at least 5 years and I'm in a lot of pain. I have a very strong suspicion that my shoulders are next in line. I am having the same issues with them that I was having with my hips 5 years ago. I have hypermobility - that's why my joints are giving out at 40. Add these chronic sources of pain to my CPTSD and anxiety disorder and I am marginally functional as it is.
And so, I have been trying to work out a from-home business writing career. Unfortunately, with all this pain and anxiety-related brain damage, I don't self-direct well. I can do an assignment independently but create an assignment, stick with that plan and follow through??? Gimme a few decades, alright - every turn - every key decision is like a brand new thesis being written over and over again - because I'm that anxiety-ridden. There's always a fatal flaw.
The truth is, I don't want to work from home. I feel like it's that cellar my grandmother always told me that children like me used to get locked in - isolating cold, just transforming what is left of me into a master of blood-thirsty rats in some dark, damp corner. Because people with cleft lips are freaks - that's life. This little piece of the puzzle is seriously counter-productive because I am pretty sure I don't have a choice in the long run.
I applied at the Goodwill with the knowledge that they hire people to work only a couple of days per week and knowing that it could save me from complete isolation. Also, I like the Goodwill's mission. It's better than selling booze.
I also applied at Department of Rehab again, hoping, hoping and hoping that I will somehow magically land the miracle caseworker, who can actually help me and not insult my every effort at helping myself.
I have been struggling with these career issues for many years - the struggle led me through graduate school and multiple career certificates.
I can't not work. I'd rather put a fork through my eyeball. My brain is far too over-active to not have someone else tell me what to do for a few hours each week.
My hope is I can work at the Goodwill a couple of days per week while I work on my business. Eventually, the store will likely be too much and I'll quit, hopefully after I have some writing work. Then, I'll fight like hell to find some way to see other human beings rather than rotting away alone in my cellar.
Is this a bad plan? Does anyone have any insight?
I do have therapy tomorrow in case anyone was wondering.
Working at a Goodwill store isn't exactly a great career move for me but I don't know what else to do. This time it actually is a retail store - I have never actually worked at a Goodwill store before - I worked eCommerce last and a military food service gig that Goodwill had a contract for in 2008.
The fact is that I know that within the next few years I will be confined to working from home - no question. My hips are in bad shape but no one will replace them for at least 5 years and I'm in a lot of pain. I have a very strong suspicion that my shoulders are next in line. I am having the same issues with them that I was having with my hips 5 years ago. I have hypermobility - that's why my joints are giving out at 40. Add these chronic sources of pain to my CPTSD and anxiety disorder and I am marginally functional as it is.
And so, I have been trying to work out a from-home business writing career. Unfortunately, with all this pain and anxiety-related brain damage, I don't self-direct well. I can do an assignment independently but create an assignment, stick with that plan and follow through??? Gimme a few decades, alright - every turn - every key decision is like a brand new thesis being written over and over again - because I'm that anxiety-ridden. There's always a fatal flaw.
The truth is, I don't want to work from home. I feel like it's that cellar my grandmother always told me that children like me used to get locked in - isolating cold, just transforming what is left of me into a master of blood-thirsty rats in some dark, damp corner. Because people with cleft lips are freaks - that's life. This little piece of the puzzle is seriously counter-productive because I am pretty sure I don't have a choice in the long run.
I applied at the Goodwill with the knowledge that they hire people to work only a couple of days per week and knowing that it could save me from complete isolation. Also, I like the Goodwill's mission. It's better than selling booze.
I also applied at Department of Rehab again, hoping, hoping and hoping that I will somehow magically land the miracle caseworker, who can actually help me and not insult my every effort at helping myself.
I have been struggling with these career issues for many years - the struggle led me through graduate school and multiple career certificates.
I can't not work. I'd rather put a fork through my eyeball. My brain is far too over-active to not have someone else tell me what to do for a few hours each week.
My hope is I can work at the Goodwill a couple of days per week while I work on my business. Eventually, the store will likely be too much and I'll quit, hopefully after I have some writing work. Then, I'll fight like hell to find some way to see other human beings rather than rotting away alone in my cellar.
Is this a bad plan? Does anyone have any insight?
I do have therapy tomorrow in case anyone was wondering.