So nervous right now, leaving controlling parent

grief

Sponsor
these feelings can be very difficult. but good for you for making the decision. it does not matter how it comes across. or if you "should" have done it some other way. i do not believe that is true. you did it in the way that felt safe for you and that is all that matters. congratulations on taking the next step of your path forward.
 

jch

Confident
these feelings can be very difficult. but good for you for making the decision. it does not matter how it comes across. or if you "should" have done it some other way. i do not believe that is true. you did it in the way that felt safe for you and that is all that matters. congratulations on taking the next step of your path forward.
Thank you. I just got a text back that said we will talk tomorrow. Tomorrow is going to be rough.
 

Friday

Moderator
How ready are you to go?

((Logistically IE Already leased a place, and packed -or mostly packed- and walking out the door tonight / meeting up with her at her place -or neutral ground- tomorrow? Or somewhat earlier in the process?))
 

jch

Confident
How ready are you to go?

((Logistically IE Already leased a place, and packed -or mostly packed- and walking out the door tonight / meeting up with her at her place -or neutral ground- tomorrow? Or somewhat earlier in the process?))
I got set up with a couple of friends. Already paid rent. My stuff is packed and ready to go. I'm still here though for a day or two.
 

Friday

Moderator
I'm still here though for a day or two.
Reads to me like you’ve approached this in the kindest way, possible.

You got your stuff sorted, and have not only given your mom a chance to react (badly, or otherwise) in private, so however she decides to approach this is an actual decision on her part... but have also... built in a couple days to spend enjoying each other if she decides to react in a loving supportive way, but if she decides to be awful? That’s not an impossible hotel/hostel bill, or time spent mostly elsewhere, with earphones and a book at night.

So you’ve given her every possible opportunity to make this transition lovely. If she chooses to make this transition miserable? That’s on her.
 

jch

Confident
Reads to me like you’ve approached this in the kindest way, possible.

You got your stuff sorted, and have not only given your mom a chance to react (badly, or otherwise) in private, so however she decides to approach this is an actual decision on her part... but have also... built in a couple days to spend enjoying each other if she decides to react in a loving supportive way, but if she decides to be awful? That’s not an impossible hotel/hostel bill, or time spent mostly elsewhere, with earphones and a book at night.

So you’ve given her every possible opportunity to make this transition lovely. If she chooses to make this transition miserable? That’s on her.
Thank you. Reading that helps a lot. I'm hoping things go smoothly, but I think I'm ready if it gos bad.
 

jch

Confident
I slept in today trying to avoid the talk. She came into my room, and said she wasn't exactly happy about it. Though she said she understands I need to live my own life. Blew me away. Probably the first time she's ever been understanding. Not what I was expecting at all, but was a pleasant surprise. She's even going to drive while I move. Thanks for the support. I really needed it.
 

DharmaGirl

MyPTSD Pro
Yay! I'm so happy for you. Keep watching out for sneak attacks though. I'm moving too since my mother is so abusive that my brother and I had PTSD ( he passed away) and my other brother was schizo-affective. I don't know if that comes from abuse but I do know the PTSD does.
 

jch

Confident
Yay! I'm so happy for you. Keep watching out for sneak attacks though. I'm moving too since my mother is so abusive that my brother and I had PTSD ( he passed away) and my other brother was schizo-affective. I don't know if that comes from abuse but I do know the PTSD does.
I will thank you. Just having a door with a lock on it has helped me sleep better.
 
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