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Some Days Are Kinda Rougher Than Others

Discussion in 'Social' started by beatle_bailey, Feb 11, 2007.

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  1. beatle_bailey

    beatle_bailey Active Member

    my head has bin kind of off line lately ,,,,, my emotiuns have bin running wild ,,, I hope I have not Offended any one ,,, if I have please except my appoligies ,,,,

    Now down to this day and others that have me in a tissy,,,,
    many differant things have bin affecting me like they haven't in years ,,
    In other words PTSD is banging on the door ,,, I would rather not answer,,,
    but I or we have no coise but to answer or react in one form or another ,,
    I have bin reaching out for help in many ways ,,, this forum is only one ,, I just spent over an hour talking to another Vet that I know ,,
    I met him in AA { and i know this can even be sensative } but he also has PTSD and like me is an alcy,, any way we were talking about how to free the heart ,soul ,mind , spirit , from the pain that most of us have so deep in side of ourself ,,, I've known him for 20 yrs we both have great respect for eachother ,, I have bin talking to many people that have known me for yrs
    and they have seen me in many or all condissions many noot so plesent ,,,
    man my spelling suc-s ,,,
    I have had to except a lot of thing abot me that I can not change and have let God work on the rest ,, Ptsd I can work on ,,, my friend tell me that I have made great strides in many ways
    I have and continue to fight many battales at the same time ,,, it get very tirering ,,, and when my head starts having all these emotions I react be for I can think some times ,,,must of the time I am able to keep control ,, I don't mind letting people I know just how fraggile I am ,,, mainly because I know tere is groth on the other side of all this pain ,,
    these are all just thing I have to talk about ,, maybe to reashore myself they are true ,, dose any one out there know or feel the same ,,
    I'm headed for a bit of a melt down,,, ,,,have you felt one coming on before ,,, the last time it happened I was in a safe plase ,, and there was 2 people that helped me threw it and they were incredably brave to just come out and sit with me after the tyraid I had just put on in the room s of AA { please remember this site was not hear ,, I had no whear else to go }
    can any one feel these thing getting ready to burst
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  3. goingonhope

    goingonhope Member Premium Member

    beatle, you're in fact fighting many battles and doing a mighty fine job of it, I might add. :kickass:

    Many of us might not be able to do it. And, many of us could. Though all the battles may not look the same, the PTSD one with all it's agony and deceptionis the same. :cussing: :angry-fla -It feels a lot like this sometimes doesn't it? We're all fighting it and hopefully continuing each day to learn new improved ways to kick it's a's. It's exhausting! I doubt that you or I are the only one's here losing control and reacting on our emotions still at times.

    Myself, I am struggling too, :crazy-eye and while doing my best to confront and re-evaluate my trauma's also doing my best to learn and apply techniques to minimize, ideally eliminate, those times of reaction.

    There are many ideas to help throughout this forum and it's up to all of us to locate these ideas and implement them. "Seek and you shall find." And, it sounds as if you know this all too well.

    Hold on when all bets are against you, or others fail you, .....and once again it's seems as if you already know this too, but thought I'd remind you, anyhow. Now does that piss you off or what? ie. reminding you of something you already know. (lots of laughs):rofl:

    No really beatle, you say, you're heading for a melt-down. If crashing is the same as a melt-down, then many of us here are experiencing this now, as I type, or have just crashed and come up from it as I have recently. It's all very normal when giving up, exposing and letting go of suppressing our PTSD trauma and symptoms.

    I'm not against responding to your posts, I'ts just been that I've been lately deeply immersed in my past, with all it's trauma and as a result undeniably absorbed in self. And, that's something I'm just going to damn well have to accept, not be ashamed of any longer, and struggle past, throughout my hopeful process and my future, ((soon to be)) therapies of healing, with all it's new discovery.

    God Bless you and please hold onto the hope that when and if that meltdown comes, you'll be safely taken care of, Beatle

    .........sincerely goingonhope

    ......wish I did feel melt-downs coming on, instead I just get abruptly hit hard, consider yourself fortunate and prepare for it, as I know and trust you're already doing.
  4. Terry

    Terry Well-Known Member

    Can't add much but I doubt too many people could handle what you have. I'm sure you've heard that before.
  5. beatle_bailey

    beatle_bailey Active Member

    thanks for the suport

    I have bin tought to say thanks for compliments ,,,even tho It is hard to ,,, you see some times I do not think I deserve them ,,, but I have bin told I deserve just as much as all of us do ,,, we all sould be able to find some pease in our life ,, there is more healing for all os us to find out there ,,, I pray we all will find it ,,, Hope you deserve a very happy life ,, I hope you hang on for the mirical to come to you ,, God will always be with you ,,,, terry I would value all you have to say ,,, just because you have your own way to say things ,,, nerver hezitate to say what is in your mind in your own words ,,, I am thankful for everones oppinion,,
    :crazy-blu thank you both :hello: Beatle
  6. anthony

    anthony Donate To Keep MyPTSD Founder

    Beatle, the thing is that if you know your going into a depressive state, that is the sign that you need to look deeper, find what the emotional value is, the core of the problem mate is emotional, nothing else, and to understand what we feel deep down is the trick to helping ourselves. When you do this, you then feel a low coming on, you look hard at what is causing it, then you think hard about what you can do to stop it now. Depression has many ways to stop it, walking, exercising, forcing ourselves outside to do things we don't normally do.
  7. beatle_bailey

    beatle_bailey Active Member

    thanks Anthony

    But that is exactly what I'm trying to do ,, I have become way to formilluar with the things hidding insideof me ,,, I hope to be able to force the shi- to the surface ,, and lord help me and the person - s around me ,,, I hope they are formilluar with how to let me have my pain and just sit with me till I come down,, this may be a bad idea ,, but I don't think so ,,this not work at all , but I will try ,,, I am not stuoid enough to think this will cure me eather , but I hope it will help ,,, I will dig deep and talk truth , and emotions will fly ,

    Anthony I do need peoples guidance understanding and love ,,, but i still must find my own way ,, :walking: thru it mate , Beatle
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