Some Sad News about @Pencil


Forum Friends,

My dear dear friend @Pencil died of a stroke on Sept. 15. It was very unexpected. She was 61. I met her here on the Forum ... a long time ago, 2011? She was a brilliant thinker, writer, and researcher. She was a great mom. She was my staunch friend through thick and thin. She taught me to write better by editing and critiquing my writing. Because of some major events in my life since 2019 I had not been so closely in touch until August and we "got back together" and resumed our multiple exhanges daily running conversation. We were just staring on two new projects... A book on ethics and a guide to homeschooling. She was also working on a book about trauma, psychology and race which she had been researching for about two years.

Her life was not an easy one. She struggled with her cPTSD and ADHD - and no small measure of social anxiety. She had difficulty maintaining 3-D relationships. I am not sure what made our relationship so special and enduring from her side. I know I loved her. She worked incredibly hard, and despite many many setbacks, and employers who took terrible advantage of her, she kept her little family of herself, her child, and their pets together through multiple moves as she fell behind on rent over and over. If she had had the support she needed she would have been a successful academic or writer. But she didn't. So she stumbled and fell. Repeatedly. I watched from close up. I know how hard she worked and tried.

It is a comfort to me to know that she had a 3D friend for the last 18 months or so who made it possible for her (and child and pets) to live in a lovely little cottage in a safe neighborhood. I am so fortunate that I got to spend some time in her space after she passed... and so terribly terribly sad that I did not get to be in it with her. I am deeply grateful that she got some measure of peace before she left us.

I am helping wrap up her affairs, and making sure her child is well cared for in a loving family. I miss her terribly. It is hard to come to terms with the fact that she is gone. I wanted to let her friends here know....


My sincere condolences; although I did not know her, I’m truly sorry for your loss. You’re an incredibly kind and loving friend to assist with her affairs and her family, and no doubt she treasured your friendship. Wishing you comfort and peace.


Oh, I’ve only just seen this…so sorry to hear of Pencil’s passing. Thank you for letting us all know and I’m sorry that you have lost a dear friend. Take care.


I'm so sorry @Eleanor , I was just thinking of you a short time ago and wondering if you were ok. I didn't know Pencil personally but I remember many of her posts resonating with me because I remember her Username. She sounds like she was a wonderfully gifted and talented, passionate writer and a woman who persevered against all odds. I am so sorry for your loss but I am glad you had such a wonderful friendship. Hugs to you.