Undiagnosed Struggling with memories from the past, could this be ptsd?

sara2998

New Here
Hi, I don't really know where to begin but I like lists so I'll try to list my symptoms and then where I think this issue started from.

- Symptoms: I have had recurring nightmares + sleep paralysis for years and the common theme is that someone is always in the room with me stopping me from leaving and that no one can hear me when I call out for help. When this happens it's literally like I prepare myself for someone harming me/ killing me, like I tell myself that its going to happen.

- What triggered me to remember my past memories: Earlier on the year I went through an incredibly stressful time with exams and schoolwork and long story short I was diagnosed with stress induced psychosis. Since then my nightmares and anxiety have been getting so much worse so I decided to just sit down and sort of have a conversation with my brain to try and understand why i'm feeling the way that I am.

- What I remember to have freaked me out as a kid: When I was 6-7 years old I went to a friends house after school and she had 2 older brothers. We were in her room when they walked in naked and started dancing and shouting. The next thing I remember is being locked in their room with my friend and they were playing incredibly loud music and shouting super loudly, I have no recollection of what they said. The one thing that sticks with me is how my friend reacted, she was screaming and banging on the door for her mum. Ive never heard anyone scream like that before. I was frozen and incredibly scared. The next thing I remember is calling my mum to tell her I didn't want to stay longer and to come and pick me up.

I have also realised that I never stay in a room with a guy if the door is closed, I literally have a panic attack if this happens. I also play this game in my head where I try to predict peoples actions and if I get it wrong I get so angry at myself.

I guess my question is could this all be happening because of what happened in my past? is it even possible to have long lasting trauma/ ptsd from something like this?

Honestly this question is why I haven't reached out to a therapist yet because I feel like I'm being overdramatic.
 

Friday

Moderator
I guess my question is could this all be happening because of what happened in my past?
Absolutely.

is it even possible to have long lasting trauma/ ptsd from something like this?
Nope.

There are a lot of other disorders caused/triggered/exacerbated by all kinds of things, that are not the kind of trauma specific to PTSD. For example, the stress induced psychosis you had earlier this past year can be stand alone, or it can be GAD, Panic Disorder, Auditory Processing Disorder, Specific Phobia, half a dozen other disorders… exacerbated by stress, sleep dep, etc., until psychosis hits.

The kind of trauma necessary to cause PTSD? Actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence.

A. Exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence in one (or more) of the following ways:
  1. Directly experiencing the traumatic event(s),
  2. Witnessing, in person, the event(s) as it occurred to others,
  3. Learning that the traumatic event(s) occurred to a close family member or close friend. In cases of actual or threatened death of a family member or friend, the event(s) must have been violent and accidental.
  4. Experiencing repeated or extreme exposure to aversive details of the traumatic event(s) (e.g., first responders collecting human remains; police officers repeatedly exposed to details of child abuse).
Note: Criterion A4 does not apply to exposure to electronic media, television, movies, or pictures, unless the exposure is work related.


Honestly this question is why I haven't reached out to a therapist yet because I feel like I'm being overdramatic.
People see therapists because they want help managing how GOOD their lives are (in order to maintain & better themselves & their lives) in addition to all manner of everything bad (from minor irritations of daily life, to severe lifelong disorders, to catastrophic events like brain injury or their children’s deaths).

So if someone can work with a therapist to maintain & better their amazing life? Having a psychotic episode following a long history of anxiety & sleep disturbance isn’t being dramatic. It’s seeking help wih a long history of anxiety, nightmares, & a recent psychotic episode.

Might you have PTSD from other trauma? Sure. Or you may be dealing with a far more serious disorder. Either way, working with someone to make your life better? Would a good thing.
 

Sideways

Moderator
Honestly this question is why I haven't reached out to a therapist yet because I feel like I'm being overdramatic.
Perhaps simplify things - try and take your head in the opposite direction of "worst case scenario", and ground yourself in what you do know.

You know you have panic attacks when you get trapped in a room with a male. So, start there. Ask for help with that specifically. See how it goes. It may improve your life immeasurably in a relatively short space of time getting on top of that symptom alone.

Once you've overcome that? Take it from there. Like @Friday said, it doesn't need to be worst-case-scenario to justify wanting to make your life liveable without panic attacks. Life doesn't need to be this difficult and distressing day to day. And that's an excellent reason to seek help.
 
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