Hopefully
MyPTSD Pro
I have been in various types of therapy for a number of years for childhood trauma and have been with my current T since the beginning of the year. I like her a lot, she has a very gentle and understanding approach.
Last week was a particularly difficult session where we talked as we nearly always do on feeling stuck and the defence mechanisms and barriers I instinctively use. They have always been there and have prevented any real break throughs with T. I want to be able to open up more to her and am really keen to make some progress but I seem to be forever getting in my own way.
We have spoken on this between us and she often asks what I need or what will help but I just don’t know what would move things forward. A part of me is desperate to engage but a stronger part is always keeping the distance.
I find the intensity of being in the room and so much focus on me very difficult. It is hard to speak about myself as it feels that the judgement and shame that will follow will be unbearable, I feel forever needing to protect myself from that.
Does anyone have any tips of anything she or I can do to move things forward? I so want to get past this point.
Last week was a particularly difficult session where we talked as we nearly always do on feeling stuck and the defence mechanisms and barriers I instinctively use. They have always been there and have prevented any real break throughs with T. I want to be able to open up more to her and am really keen to make some progress but I seem to be forever getting in my own way.
We have spoken on this between us and she often asks what I need or what will help but I just don’t know what would move things forward. A part of me is desperate to engage but a stronger part is always keeping the distance.
I find the intensity of being in the room and so much focus on me very difficult. It is hard to speak about myself as it feels that the judgement and shame that will follow will be unbearable, I feel forever needing to protect myself from that.
Does anyone have any tips of anything she or I can do to move things forward? I so want to get past this point.