T returning from leave

FauxLiz

Sponsor
My T is returning from paternity leave next week and though he told me I could reach out to him while he was gone I have respected his leave. The thing is I have not done well while he has been on leave. I have lost a significant amount of weight (relapsed my eating disorder), barely gotten out of bed except when I have needed to go my part-time retail job (major drop from my career job for the last 15 years) or the occasional interview for jobs I had applied for prior to his leave.

I am trying to decide if I should send him a brief email on Monday prior to our session highlighting what has been going on so that we don't spend the entire session catching up and not addressing anything or just continue to lay low knowing that theoretically it is unlikely we will get through the recap and even have more than 10 minutes to talk about what I can do to try and stop my downward spiral let alone stabilize again. I know that there is absolutely no way that he will have time to fit me in for an additional session next week if I wanted/could afford it because he will be catching up with all his clients so I seriously doubt there will be a vacancy in his schedule add that to the fact that I have been able to pick up extra hours at my job next week because it is spring break in this area so other people have asked for time off.

Any advice? Should I just leave it alone and wait until the session or give him a heads up email?
 

Friday

Moderator
Any advice? Should I just leave it alone and wait until the session or give him a heads up email?
I personally tend to split the difference and lead with…

what I can do to try and stop my downward spiral let alone stabilize again

I might bullet lit the components OF that spiral (eating disorder back in high gear, insomnia up, income down, etc.) but my focus is on stopping the spiral & stabilizing.

That rarely needs more than a 60-Second-Shakespeare on catch-up, as it CAN happen at any time, for any number of reasons. The components are important-ish, but not as important as throwing the breaks on, &/or immediate steps to take to restabilize.

If I send an email with all the catchup? I can expect that to take up a hefty time period in session, just like doing a lengthy catch-up in person, would. As neither is my focus? Lead with my focus.
 

Friday

Moderator
…UNLESS…

If the central issue of my spiral is “simply” not having a TrueNorth in my life to center myself self on? That’s when “the dish & the goss & Tell. Me. Everything.” IS the important piece. Sort that, and the disorganized spiraling ceases of it’s own accord.

My TrueNorth has almost never been my T… but that has happened a couple of times. So it’s an equally valid place I might find myself in. With an equally valid answer. Even the same answer, when looked at a certain way:

Lead with the important part.
 

FauxLiz

Sponsor
My T always thanks me for when I reach out to her and an email is the most professional way I think.
I was able to text my previous T but not this one and I am actually glad we have that boundary. I think I abused it at times.
My TrueNorth has almost never been my T… but that has happened a couple of times
Normally this is not the case for me either but with my career completely derailed right now I have isolated myself from my support individuals that are in that field and both of my adult kids are wrapping up their college semesters (daughter grad school, son last semester of undergrad) so I don't want to worry or distract them so my T has become my TrueNorth during this time.
 

FauxLiz

Sponsor
It’s hard to imagine a client abusing the T’s boundaries
@OliveJewel you are right they are trained at holding their boundaries, I think it goes back to not feeling worthy of being allowed that level of support from him/access to him, though he apparently believed I needed the support.
Sending an email sounds a great idea.
Now the question is when. Do I time it so that he gets is at the beginning of the day Monday or sometime tomorrow so he has time to read it before he starts meeting with clients on Monday.
 

Freddyt

MyPTSD Pro
I think it goes back to not feeling worthy of being allowed that level of support from him/access to him, though he apparently believed I needed the support.
Doesn't that just define us as PTSD patients? I got crapped on a couple times by my T for not getting a hold of them, but still there is very little chance I would do anything to "bother my T".
 
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