Well, I have to say that I had a very good week with my mom. She stopped drinking while I was visiting. She and I talked about the therapy I am going thru as well as a few of the specifics of things that happened. I told her that I was raped at 7 years old. She was shocked. Turned out that she was raped by a neighbor at 7 years old too. How weird is that? I feel like I understand her drinking so much more now. At least she was willing to talk about some things as compared to my dad who just totally cut me off and wouldn't discuss anything.
My stepdad told me he wished I didn't have to go home. That my mom does so much better when I am there. I told him that if I was there all the time she would be drinking all the time. She sobers up to be with me the few times a year we get together.
He told me how she got so drunk around Mother's Day that she passed out at a neighbors house. They called an ambulance and took her to emergency. She apparently peed all over the floor several times. The nurse told my stepdad that if she did it again he could clean it up. He was so humiliated. His telling me that brought back horrible feelings, not so much memories....just a clutching in my chest.
She did get that venomous look on her face a few times. It was aimed at my stepdad but still freaked me out a little bit. I am lucky that for the most part she doesn't direct her anger at me any more. She knows that I will walk away from her.
It's sad that I always have to keep my guard up, waiting for the other shoe to drop so to speak. I love my mom. It was nice to build some more good memories with her. The next time she rips into me I hope I can remember that!
My stepdad told me he wished I didn't have to go home. That my mom does so much better when I am there. I told him that if I was there all the time she would be drinking all the time. She sobers up to be with me the few times a year we get together.
He told me how she got so drunk around Mother's Day that she passed out at a neighbors house. They called an ambulance and took her to emergency. She apparently peed all over the floor several times. The nurse told my stepdad that if she did it again he could clean it up. He was so humiliated. His telling me that brought back horrible feelings, not so much memories....just a clutching in my chest.
She did get that venomous look on her face a few times. It was aimed at my stepdad but still freaked me out a little bit. I am lucky that for the most part she doesn't direct her anger at me any more. She knows that I will walk away from her.
It's sad that I always have to keep my guard up, waiting for the other shoe to drop so to speak. I love my mom. It was nice to build some more good memories with her. The next time she rips into me I hope I can remember that!