Tavistock Center London

Movingforward10

MyPTSD Pro
I haven't sorry.
But I've been there to do a course and had involvement with them through work at some points in my career. Mixed feelings in those capacities.
They are seen as a centre of excellence. But sometimes for me, that comes with arrogance. And I struggle with that.
But: they do have a good reputation.

What is it about their approach specifically that you're finding unsupportive?
 

Divine

New Here
I’ve started my therapy at the Tavistock but it’s very ‘patient centred’ IE I have to lead the conversation and the therapist gives less feedback/ support than other talking therapies IE they don’t say good bye or take care just ‘ this session is over’ So you are left having to leave with out having had your sessions wrapped up properly meaning I left Tavistock Friday having a breakdown all the way to the Cotswolds. I really don’t know what to do, I’ve waited over a year for this therapy and this is meant to be the space with therapists who are specialists- but they aren’t being supportive or confident in how they handle me- I don’t mind having to sit with my trauma but I do need this to be done in a safe way which doesn’t make my symptoms worse. But this therapy is my last hope, I have tried *everythIng* I can and I’m still not better in fact my symptoms are -bad- right now. I have told them how suicidal I am and they’re talking to be as if I don’t trust them or what ever but that is not something I have said- I am sick and exhausted and breaking down monthly, loosing days weekly because I continue to not get the support I need- and I have no idea what that would be- I am not a mental health specialist. This week *was* a good week until Friday…. I have been in recovery from this abuse for so long, living with this CPTSD for so long and I keep telling everyone that I can not guarantee that I will be able to do that for ever- I will not live like this- broken by the abuse of men whilst the abusers get to live their lives as normal.
 

Movingforward10

MyPTSD Pro
I hear you.
Do you feel able to say this to your therapist? Particularly about the wrapping up the session and helping with skills to get through the week?

My impression of them, from not a client/patient perspective, is that they are quite 'old schol' with the psychotherapy. I.e. being that blank slate that you talk about. Can you ask them about their modality and if they can have more of a relational aspect to the therapy? If that might help you?
 

Friday

Moderator
Putting on my Staff-Hat for a moment! 🤠

As this is a worldwide forum, very few people are likely to have any experience with that specific treatment Center… (Yay! @Movingforward10 does! And there may well be others) …but quite a lot would likely have experience with many of the issues you’re having WITH the treatment center.

My Q
  • Would you like to open the thread up (Mods can change the title to reflect that, simply click report on this post, or shoot us a note via Contact Us) to people who’ve had problems with patient centered / patient led therapy?
  • Or would you prefer to keep this one focused on Tavistock, and start a new thread on the issues, themselves?
Either option is more than fine… plenty of threads are on Sheppard Pratt, and other specific centers, and they serve a valuable purpose… but as it seems to be the modality itself, I just wanted to make sure you knew the option is available to discuss the issues you spoke so well on, below.

it’s very ‘patient centred’ IE I have to lead the conversation and the therapist gives less feedback/ support than other talking therapies
they don’t say good bye or take care just ‘ this session is over’
I’ve waited over a year for this therapy and this is meant to be the space with therapists who are specialists- but they aren’t being supportive or confident in how they handle me-
I don’t mind having to sit with my trauma but I do need this to be done in a safe way which doesn’t make my symptoms worse.
the support I need- and I have no idea what that would be- I am not a mental health specialist
I have told them how suicidal I am and they’re talking to be as if I don’t trust them or what ever but that is not something I have said-
 

Divine

New Here
I'm very confused as to what I've done wrong by discussing a center which specialises in people with complex mental health needs and covers the entire of London? I wrote this post because I wanted to discuss the Tavistock- that's why its written like this. I appreciate this is world wide that is why I posted the location in the title. I'm quite happy with this post the way it is and don't really understand what rule I've broken by posting a thread on the Tavistock?
 

Divine

New Here
I hear you.
Do you feel able to say this to your therapist? Particularly about the wrapping up the session and helping with skills to get through the week?

My impression of them, from not a client/patient perspective, is that they are quite 'old schol' with the psychotherapy. I.e. being that blank slate that you talk about. Can you ask them about their modality and if they can have more of a relational aspect to the therapy? If that might help you?
Thank you, yes I will be using the breakdown of an example of why I need basic care to frame what ever work we do- I did explain to her that that type of framework leaves me feeling very vulnerable and explained this had been an issue with EDMR and I'd been kicked out of therapy for being suicidal.
 

Movingforward10

MyPTSD Pro
I'm very confused as to what I've done wrong by discussing a center which specialises in people with complex mental health needs and covers the entire of London? I wrote this post because I wanted to discuss the Tavistock- that's why its written like this. I appreciate this is world wide that is why I posted the location in the title. I'm quite happy with this post the way it is and don't really understand what rule I've broken by posting a thread on the Tavistock?
You've not done anything wrong at all. Just a suggestion that whilst most people won't know the Tavistock, most people might be able to help with your experience of your therapist. As they may have had similar experiences, but just not at the Tavistock. If that makes sense?
Your thread. Your decision. So if this works for you, it's perfectly ok.

Thank you, yes I will be using the breakdown of an example of why I need basic care to frame what ever work we do- I did explain to her that that type of framework leaves me feeling very vulnerable and explained this had been an issue with EDMR and I'd been kicked out of therapy for being suicidal.
That's really positive you feel able to share this with your therapist. I've never done EDMR, but hear that it is very intense. I can't imagine that being helpful when there are suicidal feelings around. And I'm sorry you were kicked out of therapy for suicidal thoughts.
I hope that by sharing your experience of how the therapist interacts with you, that it helps them get to know you and support you.

In the meantime, do you have grounding techniques that work for you? I always struggle with that question when someone asks me! Because in the bad moments, all coping skills go out the window. But it is good to remember them. My T suggested writing them down and keeping the list with me. I haven't done that yet. But wiritng this has reminded me and I might do it now!
 

Divine

New Here
Sadly I already told her how the EDMR with out supportive structure left me suicidal and she didn't adapt her approach that why I had a breakdown friay after therapy .
 

Movingforward10

MyPTSD Pro
It's so hard.

I think I was retraumatised in my therapy a couple of weeks ago and it's sent me into a horrible state. I'm going to try and digest it with my T this week. Because what is it that made me go like that? Is it something about how I'm holding the trauma? Was it her approach? A combination?

Do you think you can explore it again with your T? I have been with my T two years nearly, so would say she knows me quite well and yet this has happened with me.
 

Divine

New Here
I think Im just gonna have to lay down the law and use the break down of an example of the fact I need basic politeness during sessions + wind downs otherwise I'm just being sent out into the world half way though dissasociating which is unsafe and unfair. The reason I was trying to see if any other people here had been seen by the Tavi was to see if any one knew whether they were likely to be adaptive or whether this is just gonna get me treated like a problem paitent for even asking for things which is how it seems to be. The moment you ask if people are treating CPTSD in a curative way, what therapises they offer the moment they start seeing red flags.
 

grit

MyPTSD Pro
I’ve started my therapy at the Tavistock but it’s very ‘patient centred’ IE I have to lead the conversation and the therapist gives less feedback/ support than other talking therapies IE they don’t say good bye or take care just ‘ this session is over’ So you are left having to leave with out having had your sessions wrapped up properly meaning I left Tavistock Friday having a breakdown all the way to the Cotswolds. I really don’t know what to do, I’ve waited over a year for this therapy and this is meant to be the space with therapists who are specialists- but they aren’t being supportive or confident in how they handle me- I don’t mind having to sit with my trauma but I do need this to be done in a safe way which doesn’t make my symptoms worse. But this therapy is my last hope, I have tried *everythIng* I can and I’m still not better in fact my symptoms are -bad- right now. I have told them how suicidal I am and they’re talking to be as if I don’t trust them or what ever but that is not something I have said- I am sick and exhausted and breaking down monthly, loosing days weekly because I continue to not get the support I need- and I have no idea what that would be- I am not a mental health specialist. This week *was* a good week until Friday…. I have been in recovery from this abuse for so long, living with this CPTSD for so long and I keep telling everyone that I can not guarantee that I will be able to do that for ever- I will not live like this- broken by the abuse of men whilst the abusers get to live their lives as normal.

it’s very ‘patient centred’ IE I have to lead the conversation and the therapist gives less feedback/ support than other talking therapies IE they don’t say good bye or take care just ‘ this session is over’ So you are left having to leave with out having had your sessions wrapped up properly meaning I left Tavistock Friday having a breakdown all the way to the Cotswolds.

@Divine I am sorry you are going through this. It took me 3 therapists and 4.5 yrs of doing this bullshit until (I am not kidding you not here) I ended up having a real panic attack (never had one before) and completely and utterly lost my faculty (could not function to do my job - simple compute of numbers) and was crying for help, holding my stomach and begging my husband to hug me. I learned after this is called attachment cry and all animals do it.

I am sharing the end of my journey in this wild world of therapy - client centered thingy.

What I want to convey to you is this:

You have trauma - fact you acknowledge.
You are also incredibly functional, intelligent and actually normal/healthy cause you are noticing the gap in therapy process - where therapists typecast all trauma as this way. YOU are noticing them without their help so this what I mean.
They see you as highly symptomology and it is obvious you can see the symptoms and also YOU separately - they do not. They see you as one - the frustration!
You are not getting what you need and at least based on my experience - you will struggle until you LET GO of the need for them to know more than you do about you.
And again this all depends your current situation (how safe is your life?) do you have unlimited and encouraging support system of at least one person? do you have work you can focus to often gauge how well you are recovering (energy, attention, people etc).

Can you join a group? Where you do not need to speak until you feel some sort of strength in your regulation, dissociation, and have support from the group members.

I often see this type of post and it brings back so much memories.

I want to leave with you with this:

You are not crazy or f*cked up. In fact, you have higher consciousness to have traumatic shit riding on you AND you can still see the shit in the system. I do not know for sure but it is possible you need a real connection but unfortunately a real connection with professional MUST be balanced by a real connection outside to make it work for trauma. We see professions only few hours a week and we carry trauma 24hrs so that is the calculation in real numbers.

If you do not have real and true connection outside, ptsd website is really good to check the reality even though sometimes it can get orthodoxy about things but we are many and we all think different and the site helps.

Sorry so much to say but you are heard. You are right. Client centered is only good if one is highly integrated otherwise it is horseshit of dissociation to talk endlessly in a loop! really?

Take care. Be compassionate to yourself. You are not alone at all.

sorry for any spell or confusing words - getting to work late and trying to communicate with you fast!




Adding similar post: rather than starting a new one

I think Im just gonna have to lay down the law and use the break down of an example of the fact I need basic politeness during sessions + wind downs otherwise I'm just being sent out into the world half way though dissasociating which is unsafe and unfair. The reason I was trying to see if any other people here had been seen by the Tavi was to see if any one knew whether they were likely to be adaptive or whether this is just gonna get me treated like a problem paitent for even asking for things which is how it seems to be. The moment you ask if people are treating CPTSD in a curative way, what therapises they offer the moment they start seeing red flags.

I could not put it a better way! Or you may get lucky and one person hears you. For my experience, I let it all out for that 4.5yrs and was so dissociateive riding my bike or taking the metro back - it is was so scary looking back. It felt for all these times a harm was being done. Today, I can say everything I was saying that they had no idea what the heck I was talking about was my own streaming of consciousness (I kept a tight journal). I know things I never knew now! They had no clue.
 
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