Therapist homework: Make a list of how to fix living situation (just posting in case y’all have anything to add?)

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My therapist wants me to come up with a list for how to deal with the house I’m living in. I have two weeks. Prompt was to think of ways — even if they are utterly ridiculous — to either get the house cleaned or get me out of it.

I’m posting it here in case anyone can think of anything, though I’m not sure how to give you enough information to make sure it’s useful to anyone.

Anyway, list of getting the house cleaned:
  • Call mom’s to-be therapist myself and force her
  • Call the city except they don’t threaten to make us homeless
  • Have a dragon burn the f*cking place down
  • Clean it out myself by throwing everything away and somehow I won’t end up with flashbacks of being almost neglected to death
  • Tornadoes that refuse to hurt any living thing

List of ways to get me out:
  • Ask Bill Gates for a new foundation supporting kids trying to leave their mentally unstable parents
  • Ask the dragon if it needs someone to organize her things after she burns the place down
  • Live in a tent
  • Get employed and save up
  • Ask grandparents to buy me a house or help with rent in my most spoiled sounding voice
  • Ask my university if online students can be supported with housing
  • Pass away in an accident
  • Build my own log cabin
  • Get a job and live there
  • Ask the synagogue if I can stay occasionally
  • Ask the synagogue if anyone needs an unemployed roommate
  • Ask the city I live in if anyone needs an unemployed roommate
  • Become a nanny
  • Beg family members to stay with them and they won’t protest about the two rescued black widows
  • Live in a women’s shelter


Live in a tent

And a traveling wagon.
Join the travelers and get out for good.
Hitchhike for a living.

Ask the synagogue if I can stay occasionally
And the mosque. Appeal at charity being actually an obligation.
Form a church group / kitchen / cook for the bigger events... and sleep in there (bonus if a tent be yours).
Rent the tent, pay for other space by that. Tents can be pooopular hot items. :D
Or pray for rats flooding the area, everybody gets bigger worries by that time, the seven deadly plagues will also do.

... You could also volunteer to house a few hundred leeches wherever you go as a do not disturb nor question the housing location act of charity, Canada might be thankful.

Rent a boat, ship either yourself, or the mess, far away. (Ssh, we are ignoring eco laws for a wee bit of a moment, that boat mighta get hijacked in a lil.)

... Coulda be here tomorrow, prolly, and is it better or worse that I am half serious about most of those?

But nah, you passing away, not even in an accident, not on a list.
Sending up angry Chinese courses (or, well, down.) instead dat.


Ask my university if online students can be supported with housing
1. Yes.
2. Find out requirements for student housing... then do that.

Live in a women’s shelter
- Whilst applying for student housing, and financial aid, and student jobs
- Whilst applying for student jobs, and saving up for renting a room
- Whilst applying for full time jobs, and saving up for renting a place

If ever hospitalised (or similar)
Do NOT say “yes” when asked if you have a place to go.

Saying “yes” means that you do not want assistance with housing, or funding housing.

There are all kinds of sober living, group homes, long term shelters, transitional housing, etc... that the prerequisite is that you don’t already have a home. You have to say “no” and continue saying “no” (what about family? Friends? Etc.) to all of the following questions. You don’t have to lie... I HAVE already stayed with family, friends, etc. At this point I don’t have other options... but you have to be very firm in “No. I do not have a place to live.” Then there’s tons of help available. But first you have to say you need that help.
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Find a job (any kind for right now)
Ask grandparents for a small loan
Find apartment
Move out

I don't think there is anything you can do about the house other than calling the authorities or informing your grandparents about the situation and letting them take care of it.
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if anyone needs an unemployed roommate

Reminds me:
And this bit: You are not only an unemployed roommate.
You are a roommate that can help them manage (or manage for them) their living, whether that be cleaning, or taking care of the bills, or taking care of the communication with the management / renters, keeping track of changes in the housing policy/ies, and so on.

Someone very much helping people not get evicted? That is a service, if nothing else. :D
Totally something you are contributing with, and skills.


Find someone looking for a house sitter/pet sitter and stay there, start doing this as a semi-permanent gig especially if in a university community as traveling professors may need someone for a semester or even a full year

contact local charitable organizations like Goodwill or Salvation Army they may be able to help clean out the house in return for donating any surplus items (you get to decide what is surplus not them)
If you are a student, then the question about unemployment tona potential landlord is easy - you are a student. Many students don’t work at all. That’s totally normal.

I would ask your university for help. Even if they can’t help you, they probably have loads of resources, as well as a running document of local student-friendly landlords and students looking for roommates.


The stuck feeling is something I think of as part of the trauma re enactment. Poverty and poor living arrangements and abusive situations all contributing. We lived this all these years? The therapist is fond of saying "where are you stuck?" I know what she means.
So, we are living in a home of our own finally but we are very much older and have the problems older people have not the least of which is "what's going to happen when (not if) one of us gets sick and dies?"
Both of us are part of the re enactment. We have each other though which is quite a lot.
I was always trying to do what you are trying to do (do something) but I understood finally that all that effort which was trauma based like everything, was just me working my ass of to put me right back in the same old place I started.
It made me so angry all the time all that excruciating effort that never really accomplished anything. In the end I realized the only thing I can do is be happy because that neutralizes it?
You might say, "how can you be happy given the bleak picture you just painted" and my answer is, "because it's the only way." Like when they finally get me, I'm going to be laughing, because I survived.
So do whatever you can, im not saying don't try but, it has to lose that "banging your head against the wall" energy? We laugh now a lot more. It's so much nicer. There's plenty to be miserable about.

Last year at this time we had nowhere to live and were being evicted from where we were and had no idea where we were going to end up. I'm entirely sympathetic and I hope you feel better.


Ask grandparents to buy me a house or help with rent in my most spoiled sounding voice
yes -- but don't use the spoiled voice. Use the "I understand the position I'm in and here is how I plan to help myself in the future, here is why I'm going to school, here is what I plan to accomplish" voice. That makes a huge difference
Beg family members to stay with them and they won’t protest about the two rescued black widows
Hubby's sister lived with us for a while when she was in school -- instead of paying rent she did the housework, yardwork and the cooking. Talk about a win/win! :)


I stayed with my sis and BIL when I was younger. I watched my nephew for them full time during the day and went to school at night. Free room and board and they paid me a little bit of money too. It was great to be able to bond with my nephew for the first 9 months of his life.

Just throwing ideas out there.
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