Therapy is almost over

Hopemeanslife

Bronze Member
I have been with my therapist for about 6months every week, I’m starting to find it taxing, kind of feels like a relationship? I guess it is in some ways. But I want out at this point, I don’t know why but anything about having to see someone on a weekly basis really angers me.

At one point obviously I loved seeing him and thought he was great and now I just am over the whole thing. I mean it has been nice to talk to someone about how I’ve been feeling especially as my symptoms are probably at its worst point, therapy opened up a lot of flashbacks I would say, I never experienced them until I started going therapy and funny enough I don’t even think we spoke about my triggers for there to be a trigger.

I guess I will miss seeing him in ways but at the same time I don’t think I am cut out for any form of relationship with anyone on any level it’s just too difficult.

I’m meant to have EMDR and TF-CBT at some point this year so I need a break from all these people, I find it takes a lot of energy to sit and talk to these people especially for me because then I go to work after. Hopefully that will do something, I’m not sure what the plan of action is to even move through this all and get better, all they do is say you need therapy, but what is therapy meant to do for people. I’m so confused how people are expected to forget everything by just talking to someone.

I was worried at some point during therapy that I wouldn’t cope if I didn’t have him to talk to so he extended my sessions for longer. But now it’s all just like I didn’t feel that way at all, because I realised that I don’t have anyone on my side, not really, no one quite understands what it is really like, what everyday is really like, and well I live that everyday so I’m sure I’ll live without him
 
I was worried at some point during therapy that I wouldn’t cope if I didn’t have him to talk to so he extended my sessions for longer. But now it’s all just like I didn’t feel that way at all, because I realised that I don’t have anyone on my side, not really, no one quite understands what it is really like, what everyday is really like, and well I live that everyday so I’m sure I’ll live without him
I would encourage sticking it out. I think there is this horrible hard part of therapy where you're digging up the past, ittflashing lights on various parts of your life, and you're undoing the coping strategies you had, and not yet learnt the new ways of being so you're left in this horrible stage of being in the thick of it.
The crap thing about therapy is that the only way out is through. If you leave therapy now, you're still stuck in this feeling. If you stick with it, you can come out of the other side.
I always said to my T that therapy needs to find an easier, and quicker, way for healing as the process surely sucks.

What you have put in your post, are they things you have spoken to your T about? It might really help if you do.
Maybe there is a way of slowing therapy down or T might have insights to help with all the realisations you are having.
 
I would encourage sticking it out. I think there is this horrible hard part of therapy where you're digging up the past, ittflashing lights on various parts of your life, and you're undoing the coping strategies you had, and not yet learnt the new ways of being so you're left in this horrible stage of being in the thick of it.
The crap thing about therapy is that the only way out is through. If you leave therapy now, you're still stuck in this feeling. If you stick with it, you can come out of the other side.
I always said to my T that therapy needs to find an easier, and quicker, way for healing as the process surely sucks.

What you have put in your post, are they things you have spoken to your T about? It might really help if you do.
Maybe there is a way of slowing therapy down or T might have insights to help with all the realisations you are having.
That’s the thing I don’t really think I have learnt all that much coping strategies from him at all, I just feel like we talk and it’s goes round and round. He says we make progress but I’m not really sure I see it. So is probably for the best it’s come to an end. I have said to him many times I don’t see what I gain from this all, honestly I feel the same, things don’t seem easier, things just seem more in my face where it’s hard to ignore. We have two sessions left, think I need more help he can offer
 
think I need more help he can offer
It sounds like you're on the right track and might need to look around for another therapist. Is this therapist trained in trauma? I've found that makes a big difference. Getting the right support in therapy makes a big difference. So maybe don't give up on therapy, but instead consider finding a therapist that can meet your needs. It's ok if the first, second, or 8th therapist isn't a good fit. Keep looking until you find the right one.
 
General Therapy / Marriage & Family Therapy / even a whole lotta specific disorder therapy (like ADHD therapy, eating disorder therapy, grief therapy, etc.) is like going to the doctor when you’re sick/injured and getting meds, or a cast, or whatever… and start feeling immediately better.

Trauma Therapy is like reconstructive surgery & physical therapy where you walk in… and spend the next year in physical therapy before you can even stand, much less walk. Wheelchair to crutches to a cane EAT the whole first year, or two, where you cannot even stand -or drag yourself along- for longer than a few minutes. But? By the end are not only walking, but running, jumping, doing cartwheels. Both Trauma Therapy & Physical Therapy? SUCK. They’re horrid, awful, painful, exhausting, demoralizing, humiliating, infuriating things… until they start to work. And then? It’s even worse. Until? It starts getting better. Loooooooooong after when we think we “should” be getting better.

Do the TF-CBT & EMDR, and expect them to suck. A LOT. And need around a day or two to recover from. So do NOT schedule times you have to go back to work, or parenting, or being responsible. Not until you know how long & how badly the therapy-hangover will be, and you’re a pro at managing it.

DITTO Everyone else, if your therapist is only doing generalized/talk therapy with you, and isn’t doing coping strategies, trauma therapy, etc.? Ask them to start, or find a new therapist who will.
 
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