This is the kind of day…

Not as planned. I avoided my family because I don’t want to have to put so much effort in to the interactions so I went to my aunts. But there was drama there and since that’s what I’d avoided I really wished I’d just chosen to stay home. To be fair it might’ve been the conversation I got sucked into about my cousin and what she’s going through which is dealing with the abuse of her past which since no one knows mine they don’t know how triggering that conversation is for me. Nor do they know that speaking of her anger makes me fear that being something I will have to go through ya know stages of grief is much like the stages of recovering from trauma because it means grieving what you thought you had before you started realizing the reality of your world. So I’d say my day was … complicated.
Mine was nice! I talked to the owner of the shop on the street I get my ciggies at about Belgium vs Canada, cuz my friend told me about it. Then we went to the store and I got lots of food and things, now I'm having a bubble bath and a smoke and a coffee in the bath because I can, hahehaha 😈 I talked to my friends most of the day and the rest I spent with ma and just taking care of Weemers. 👾
…one gets through.

Maximum effort. Minimal result.

How was your day?
I was invited to a friend's, but not until 7 so I had almost the whole day to face. Been having some crazy plumbing issues at my apartment and non-responsive management so looking to leave, was panicked. I tested myself to find the answers and started the online research. Now, I have a plan!

Also, my dad called me even though they'd already asked if I could call them today and I didn't respond.

So pushy, so controlling.

I don't actively wish anyone harm, but I do feel life will be easier when my dad passes on. His behavior is just something that I alone may understand. But, look at my boundaries growing!
kids were here last sunday, with their in laws thanksgiving. It truly is a regular day for me, except I can't work, stores are closed, and driving with the drunks is not an option. So, i lay low, open a bottle of wine and watch football or play a guitar or just generally fall out. Feels OK.