Too Ashamed To Try.

[occam]

It just gnaws at the back of my head, I can't shake the feeling that I am not worth loving. I have a long road to go to learn to undo what happened to me, but the road is so hard, and despite my reservations to the contrary, I dislike doing it alone. How do you make room for someone else when you carry so much else around, so much baggage. How can I ever really explain what's wrong with me to someone. How can I look at them when they know, when I can barely look at myself in the mirror.

 

[illusionist]

I remember feeling exactly as you are now...but I asked the question after failed relationships. I took ten years out and worked on dropping off my baggage bit by bit....I've still got baggage, always will, but I think I minimised it, as far as I could, before getting into the relationship I am in now. I'm not saying to work on yourself for ten years, but to work on yourself for as long as you need.

I still go in and out of the feeling that I'm not worth loving but know that my partner feels that I am......that's what keeps me going at these times.

 

[Gadgie]

Quote...."I still go in and out of the feeling that I'm not worth loving but know that my partner feels that I am......that's what keeps me going at these times."

That's nice, it must make you feel good to have a partner like that. I don't think I will ever be in a relationship again, not because of my low esteem or lack of confidence, it's because I feel I have nothing left to offer, I'm drained.